73 replies to this topic

[Dovahkiin234]

I lol'ed at this, I don't know about you.

 

So I was at Jorrvaskr, and I was talking to one of the Companions (I think it was Ria?), and she said, "I just killed a bear yesterday. Anything you killed?"

 

I had just killed Alduin.

[LittleFighter]

Some dialogue my follower had with the priests of kynareth.

 

Danica: Oh I've been meaning to speak with you.

Vixen: Yes what is it. (Or something along those lines)

Male priest with beard: Ladies is there anything a big strong man can do for you?

Vixen: I don't know, let me know if you see one.

Danica: (Laughs)

Bearded priest: Harpies all of them!

Vixen: Oh come now don't go away mad.

Edited by LittleFighter, 07 March 2013 - 05:50 PM.

[imperium999]

The other responses you can give the doors at the two DB Sanctuaries...

 

"What is life's greatest illusion?"

"Marriage?"

 

[billyro]

The two kids arguing in Rorikstead. If you talk to Britte afterwards, she says

"If you beat up my sister Sissel, I won't tell anybody."

 

I never do though, Sissel receives enough beatings from her sister and father. So I beat them up instead!

[terlaN592]

Humour? What about this satire which happened to me today ?

 

 

[sisterof]

I know this is old as Paarthurnax, but since I don't get my characters naked often, it really made me lol...

After spending a while changing different armors and forgetting to put any on, my very naked Nord Dovahkiin waltz by a Redoran Guard, who promptly informs:
"You are not as attractive as you like to think."

[Lithium Flower]

Oh god, that happened to me - most mortifying moment in Skyrim. It was Teldryn Sero and I was um... just testing out this mod here with him...yes... for SCIENCE, yes that's it - and just after the deed was done, he pops out that line.

One night stands suck

[sisterof]

Oh god, that happened to me - most mortifying moment in Skyrim. It was Teldryn Sero and I was um... just testing out this mod here with him...yes... for SCIENCE, yes that's it - and just after the deed was done, he pops out that line.
 

Wow, what an insensitive jerk!   And of course, SCIENCE demands so much of us. I commend your dedication.

Another very common one, that I always find funny since it rarely triggers, is when someone is talking to me and I press TAB and leave, only to hear them shouting in the distance something along the lines of "Well, I was finished anyway!".

Oh, and the woman's naked body you find over a stone in a lake, crossed by a Forsworn arrow if I remember correctly. On the margin, there's her equipment perfectly organized and a note saying something like "My father says it's dangerous here in the wilderness with all these Fornsworn, but I love swimming in the lake. I'm sure it's safe enough!"

Oh oh! How could I forget that. I'm aware I'm easily amused but damn, I laughed to tears the first time I heard Galmar saying "That godless Emperor can shove his damn treaty into the steaming nether-reaches of my you-know-where." STEAMING. It's so... thoroughly  descriptive and colorful. And he says his nether-reaches, not the Emperor's, which probably wasn't his intention before his mind simply got lost in the... um... poetry of it.


 

Edited by sisterof, 14 March 2013 - 02:30 PM.

[sisterof]

And today, as Dovahkiin waltzed around Whiterun, comes a guard:

"With respect, Companion, I'd ask that you and your friends muzzle that dog of yours. The howling coming from Jorrvaskr has gotten out of hand."

[Lithium Flower]

"Is that ...fur coming out of your ears?"