Hey!? BKE won't rag on your JAnders-crush. (And others shouldn't either...)
I can understand the attraction, but I just get so tired of both his, and Fenris', single-issue whinging that I can't get interested in either one. I think the straight, female, Hawke has the short end of the LI-options stick.
Actually, its easy. You don't have to listen to your man any more once you've got him to make the commitment of moving in. Just leave him at home doing the cooking and cleaning while you go out adventuring. He never talks to you at home anyway.
Incidentally, if you break up with Anders after that first night, can you still go on to complete a Fenris romance? I have a half-finished "nasty-Hawke" game where I'm thinking of trying that. Sleep with Fenris, sleep with Anders, then go back to Fenris.