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Your memorable nonquest/nonscripted stories


thesapien

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This story is from my Nord Assassin/Talos Loyalist character.

 

During the DB quest-line I'm in Solitude for a certain someones wedding, head on into the Temple of the Divines and I decide to make a little small-talk with the only priestess (Frier) wandering around before I headed on upstairs. I ask her about the empty pedestal and she goes into this long rant about how Talos is a pretender god, I quickly ended are conversation and proceed to behead her with a swirling swing of Mahrunes Razor, drag her lifeless body up to the alters and neatly set her headless corpse on Talos vacant pedestal before heading on upstairs to complete my contract.

 

Several days later I'm jumped by 3 Thugs while exiting the secret tunnel from the Underforge; unluckily for them I was exiting to go on my nightly hunt and had already made the transformation, hunted them through the plains like scared deer. After my hunger was sated I searched the corpses for the Bounty and discovered it was from Rorlund (a priest in the Temple of the Divines) in retaliation for the murder of his dear wife Frier. :rolleyes:

 

Went back burned him alive and put his body on the pedestal, together again. :whistling:

Edited by SaintAnon
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During the final quest in the main story line. I made it to a point where I was surrounded by Draugr Deathlords who were quite insistant on me not stopping their master Alduin. They voiced this opinion by repeatedly shouting me off the side of the ledge with such force that I always invariably ended up splashing about in the water.

 

The first time I was a little upset that I had gotten caught off guard, but I shrugged it off and went back up there to teach them a lesson about screwing with a dovahkin, cut to 20 minutes later and I am trapped in a bad slap stick sketch as they repeatedly shout me off the mountain only for me to run back up there again to repeat the process.

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During the final quest in the main story line. I made it to a point where I was surrounded by Draugr Deathlords who were quite insistant on me not stopping their master Alduin. They voiced this opinion by repeatedly shouting me off the side of the ledge with such force that I always invariably ended up splashing about in the water.

 

The first time I was a little upset that I had gotten caught off guard, but I shrugged it off and went back up there to teach them a lesson about screwing with a dovahkin, cut to 20 minutes later and I am trapped in a bad slap stick sketch as they repeatedly shout me off the mountain only for me to run back up there again to repeat the process.

 

I definitely was picturing your character as Curly from the stooges there. Sprinting towards the Draugr at full speed with a furious cry of "Woo woo woo!", only to be repeatedly knocked on your head.

 

Oh a wise guy, huh?

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I was heading to Nocturnal's Santuary where you do the Pilgrim's Path thing at the end of the Thief's Guild questline, and happened upon this gawky youth standing over a wolf carcass yelling "get up! Get up!"

 

Naturally this piqued my curiosity, so I stopped and talked to him. It turns out he found this staff that had belonged to his grandfather or something and all of a sudden the dead started rising around him. He thought it was his power, even went to the College of Winterhold where they laughed at him and told him it was the staff. So now he was standing out in the middle of nowhere, attempting to raise a wolf from the dead to prove them wrong. Obviously unsuccessfully. I tried to get him to give me the staff, but he would not. So I tried to pick pocket the staff away from him, but he caught me. Annoyed, I killed him and took the rather valuable staff off his corpse.

 

Then I continued merrily along my way to the Sanctuary.

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I was heading to Nocturnal's Santuary where you do the Pilgrim's Path thing at the end of the Thief's Guild questline, and happened upon this gawky youth standing over a wolf carcass yelling "get up! Get up!"

 

Naturally this piqued my curiosity, so I stopped and talked to him. It turns out he found this staff that had belonged to his grandfather or something and all of a sudden the dead started rising around him. He thought it was his power, even went to the College of Winterhold where they laughed at him and told him it was the staff. So now he was standing out in the middle of nowhere, attempting to raise a wolf from the dead to prove them wrong. Obviously unsuccessfully. I tried to get him to give me the staff, but he would not. So I tried to pick pocket the staff away from him, but he caught me. Annoyed, I killed him and took the rather valuable staff off his corpse.

 

Then I continued merrily along my way to the Sanctuary.

 

Exact same thing happened to me, except I was on the quest 'In My Time of Need'.

 

Anyway. I had just decided I wasn't buying any houses and that I would store everything in the DB Sanctuary, this was after I had completed the main questline. After storing everything and getting a contract, I strolled casually outside, planning to fast-travel to Whiterun and sell some of the random gems I had in my inventory. I couldn't fast travel, though. This confused me, as normally there's nothing bugging me outside the Sanctuary, and I took a glance around. Nope, nothing, and the music was still normal. Sighing, I decided to head over to Dawnstar, just around the corner, so the guards could find whatever-it-was (I was assuming mudcrab) and kill it.

 

I walked forward and saw nothing over there, no guards or enemies. I decided I'd jump on Shadowmere for a faster ride. I turned around, felt an earthquake as I did so, and came face-to-face with a Blood Dragon.

 

Then the music started.

 

Needless to say, its skeleton is now decorating the rocks just outside the Sanctuary.

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I was in Dawnstar to meet someone at the inn. As I enter, the first thing I see across the room are four large, burly men sitting side by side facing the wall.

 

Then, as if on cue, they all get up and spin around to face me. It all just seemed so perfectly synchronized, I was half expecting them to do a motown hit, or something.

 

Also. Ran into a thief the other day. We're in a pitched dual to the death, as usual. Out of the blue, an Imperial patrol comes along and takes over. Well, the thief is beat and begs for mercy and the Imperial spares his life.

 

So away we all go, running along like the best of chums. Me, the Imperial soldiers, and the thief who turns to me and says as nice as you please, "How can I help you, friend?"

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So this is more of a glitch, but it was pretty funny. I got caught in the big fight in Markarth after you liberate Madanach from Cidnha silver mine, and since I was done with the quest I decided to go on immortal mode so I wouldn't get killed. Which was lucky, because some lunatic guard chopped my head off!

 

The problem was that thereafter I had no head. I tried switching genders, opening the race menu, all sorts of stuff to reset my character but nothing worked. Well I didn't want to run around with a headless character forever, so I wound up going back to an older save and having to redo the stupid Cidnha mine quest anyways.

 

It was pretty funny watching my character run around Skyrim headless. Even funnier was the NPCs acted like nothing was wrong!

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