Uh, hi. OP here.
I understand that a new issue has arisen after SSE got secretly updated (f***ing Bethesda man). This post was made BEFORE that update was launched. I was and still am unable to launch SSE correctly. It seems we'll have to wait until SKSE64 gets updated for my issue to be looked into.
I just wanted to toss this out so that people wondering why SSE suddenly isn't working don't come to this post looking for answers since it's an entirely different problem.