Hello all ! Well....my take on this from what I do! First I am a middle aged guy, happily married with kids etc.....yet I Play Skyrim as a woman....always have. Now the fun bit....and it gets a bit crazy, but bear with me. I started on release day 11.11.11. And very quickly decided on the "I Like females so thats what I Want to see on my screen" kinda mentality. I generally switched a lot from first to third person views. I created a blond pony tailed Nord as striking as vanilla would allow. Not cute you understand, but proud strong womanly and radiating raw man melting female power...that type! In time without aiming to....I established things my char always liked to do and liked to avoid....so I was in fact role playing her.....without a backstory or preset idea. Importantly....I really liked the look of my char a lot and despite playing the "Dead is Dead" game style I kept bringing her back for square one, restart after restart. Soon it just felt natural to be with her and I needed no change of char...in fact I would miss her. Now....hang on for this bit ok. Many of you will know how a long term RP (role play) character kinda creates that "feeling" in the player of what the char feels comfortable with...(eg maybe not wearing helmets or certain armours). This is because you get so used to making certain decisions for them...it feels like you already know what they want for any eventuality. Those feelings are a way your character kind of communicates with you. Now....a little jump.....where is your char? Well the build and skills and appearance are in your computer....but.....the personality of them can only reside in the player. In your mind! So....my long play girl has this kinda personality brewing in my head. When I see her on screen the bag of feelings that pertain to her associates with the screen likeness that resembles her. Then a realisation hits me......all the things she likes and wants and does and avoids.....have grown without a 'backstory' and fed from the only source available in my head.....me! Yet....oddly....upon self analysis.....all her traits are totally dead opposite to my own. So I have this very long term female "Alter ego" ( female now cos its opposite to me...see) as a game character. Her desires often...not surprisingly...conflict with mine. We are Holmes and Moriarty both matched, both locked in conflict yet needing each other. An example of our opposite natures....apart from obvious gender....I am a gentle guy...she is a hard warrior. I am by most accounts a kind person...she can be very cruel to bandits! I am long winded and verbose....she always comes over as pithy and concise. I am a regular working guy....she expresses as cultured and refined (the occaisional fine cigar and very expensive wines kinda lady). She, her character, underwent an odd change last december and after an uncertain period of weakening she returned evolved, far stronger in all traits....good and bad! So where does that leave me? Well I honestly don't feel ok about playing any other char now....period. And....I don't even play her now as much as 'facilitate' her. She knows what she wants to do in Skyrim now....I just twiddle the analogue sticks for her. Her name is Contessa Adella Di nascosta-mente. Or just Adella to friends :) She is waaaay above my station in life and I am honoured to host her acquaintance.
