While I would keep Hanharr and Mira mutually exclusive, gender shouldn't determine if an NPC joins a party, especially if there is a body of canon and variety of alternatives. How could Star Wars: KOTOR II be modded to enable the Handmaiden AND the Disciple to join the party? I would also adjust any talk about romance for the male Jedi Exile (I like to call him "Meetro Surik") and the female Jedi Exile (actual name per SW canon being "Meetra Surik") accordingly. Everyone think and be creative!