Chuck norris jokes

[Mavrosh]

One day Chuck Norris had the idea of peeing into cans and selling it. We know this stuff as "red bull".

[TheCalliton]

men dont mind if their wives dream of S** with chuck norris, because they are too.

 

Chuck norris eats nails and S***s bullets

[Thor.]

I have some

 

1. Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.

 

2. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

 

3. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

 

4. Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack.

[inkheart449]

Chuck Norris once had s** with a semi truck, we now know that semi as Optimus Prime.

Chuck Norris has a go-kart made out of the hopes and dreams of children...it goes fast.

Jesus turned Water into Wine, then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water, and make him drink.

Chuck Norris once had a staring contest with the Sun, and WON.

[DeathWarrior]

Chuck Norris got to da choppa

 

Once, Chuck Norris and Mr. T battled, the result was the 80's

 

Chuck Norris can touch this, and can thus end Hammertime

 

Chuck Norris has a gold medallion of him wearing a gold medallion of him wearing a gold medallion

 

Chuck Norris sleeps in room 1408

 

Chuck Norris dosen't go hunting, he goes killing

 

Chuck Norris saw Richter at the party

[Ihoe]

1.Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

 

2.Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

 

3.you want a list of Chuck Norris’ enemies, just check the extinct species list.

 

4.When Chuck Norris does Push-ups, he doesn't push himself up, he pushes the world down

 

5.Darth Vader dresses up as Chuck Norris for Halloween.

 

6.A handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

 

7.The original name of the movie was Alien vs Predator vs Chuck Norris, but the producers realized that nobody would ever watch a movie that only lasted fourteen seconds.

 

8.Who would win the race between Ironman and Superman to the moon?

 

Chuck Norris