Kids or No Kids?

[ffa1mf]

OK, the question this time is: Do you want children? and Do children bring happiness?

 

Yes, I wanted children and married a girl who wanted children as well and we did have children – 2 wonderful girls.

I can’t speak for anyone else, but my two girls have been a huge source of joy, wonder and happiness for me and my wife and continue to be.

 

Does money affect your decision on having children?

 

I suppose it did to a point, but in my case it was more about what point in life my wife and I were at at the time (careers). As a result, we had children quite a bit later in life than most of the people in our same age group, and at the point in our life when we did have children money wasn’t a significant problem. My wife and I had made a plan about what we wanted to accomplish in life and pretty much stuck to the plan, and as a result we didn’t have children until we had achieved certain goals.

I should also note that while there is a recession ongoing for a good part of the world right now, when my wife and I had children my country was in the worst recession it had seen since the 1930’s. Did we struggle somewhat financially? Yes, but like most people we knew what we wanted, set priorities and made the choices we did and worked on solving the problems so we could achieve what we wanted.

 

What do you miss without children?

 

I don’t know if you can miss something that doesn’t exist. While I cannot imagine my life without my children, I suppose that if I never had any I wouldn’t have missed anything either. I also think I wouldn’t be the same person I am now if I had not had children. It becomes an exercise in “what ifs” and really there is no answer to that supposition game. Life is what it is and we do the best we can with it because sometimes we don’t get to make the choice.

 

What if the children become total failures in life, would you still be proud of them or ashamed of them?

 

I’m not even sure what a total failure in life would consist of so it’s pretty hard to answer that question. I can only say that no matter what my children do in life I will love them and be there for them.

 

If children bring only misery to you, wouldn´t it be better to be without them?

 

It’s hard for me to imagine how a child would bring “only misery”, and additionally, I think “misery” is sort of subjective. I know people who think their child has brought them more than their share of misery but, as far as I can see their child is a very nice person who I enjoy seeing and talking with; so it is hard to judge why these parents feel their child has brought them misery. On the other hand, I know a couple who have an autistic child who has what are considered severe behavioral problems and the parents don’t seem to think the child has brought them any misery at all.

Until you have a child how do you know what they will bring to you?

[Nintii]

No, I don't want children ... that doesn't mean I hate kids or anything along those lines ... I love kids ... but no, I have not found the guy that I feel is right for that, and "that" to me is a very big deal.

 

Ok, so it's morning and I've had a chance to sleep on it ... I think I do want kids but first;

 

I'll set up a booth in the Mall, buy a copy of Playboy or Loslyf and a cup.

And the first guy to answer all 827 questions correctly and who gets at least 90 something percent on the psycholgy exam gets to be the daddy.

 

No, seriously I will have kids ... and I reckon the current guy in my life might just be the man ... he's not perfect but he loves me.

Edited November 30, 2011 by Nintii

[Jopo1980]

It is seen as almost a law of nature that parents love their children unconditionally, but is that always so? Some children can be horribly difficult and strain their parents nerves a lot.

[draconix]

It is seen as almost a law of nature that parents love their children unconditionally, but is that always so? Some children can be horribly difficult and strain their parents nerves a lot.

 

There are some parents out there incapable of loving their own children, regardless of how terrible (or not) the actually children are. My wife's mother's side of the family is a true testament to that. They have a long line of hatred towards their own kin. My wife and I aim at ending the cycle by abstaining from spawning.

[Jopo1980]

As I´ve said, my reasons for not wanting children are purely financial. Without the necessary resources to provide the family with a lifestyle I want, I will not have children.