Family, Is blood still thicker than water?

[kvnchrist]

I'm not sure, really how to set this up. It seems that there are a considerably younger audience here at this site, than I am. I'm not saying that everybody younger than I feels differently. I wouldn't be that insulting to those I know only so well. What I am saying is that there is a very good chance that the experiences that those younger than me are so different, than those I've had, in my youth, that the changes I've seen, have been unseen by you.

 

I'm not saying that when I was growing up, that things were perfect. Far from it. We can see, with the advent of the internet, that horrible acts that were once hidden, revealed. A lot of the false security we deluded ourselves with and the semblance of freedom we believed in was a fairytale we told ourselves. What I am asking is if being a member of a family holds more or less of a bond than it has held in the past? Is being a family means sticking together or sticking it to each other.

 

Are family members more comfortable in taking advantage of their own family than they are of strangers. Do these types prey on their family counting on the idea of being part of a family to excuse their actions.

[Quetzlsacatanango]

"Blood" family probably means less than it used to. Sometimes rightly so. A lot of peoples' families are total d-bags and there is not the social pressure to cover it up or let it slide that maybe there once was.

I would say that people are tending to build the families that work for them. It's a lot easier these days to connect with people outside your household if that's what you need to do. Overall I would say it's a good thing if I had to choose one way or the other.

[grannywils]

Kvnchrist, I had a little difficulty wading through the presentation of your premise, but will attempt to answer the specific question in your post.

 

I believe that I am even older than you are, and here is how I feel. We are all human beings, regardless of age. If we could manage to think of ourselves as a human family and deal with one another in that manner we might be able to recognize that the Golden Rule would be a useful tool for all of us.

 

Yes, this is a simplification, but I also believe in the KISS principle.

[HeyYou]

I think there is just as much variation today in family values, as there has always been, it is just more publicized than previously. The advent of mass media, instant news, instant world-wide communication, has made the world smaller, and secrets harder to keep. I see people every day that take very good care of their families, and would never knowingly take advantage of them. However, I also see folks that are only interested in what the family can do for them, and these are the folks that keep their disabled parents behind locked doors, so that they can just take their money, and satisfy their own needs, while seriously neglecting the rest of the family. (especially the parents that don't have the ability to speak for themselves.)

 

Seems for some, the Golden Rule has mutated... Do unto others, BEFORE they get the chance to do unto you.......

[hoofhearted4]

i love my family.

[ginnyfizz]

I do not think family ties are any less strong than they were, but the advent of mass media and travel changes the dynamics of those families. It's not uncommon to have branches of a family spread over several continents - mine certainly is. But with Skype and email and stuff like that making communication so much easier, that doesn't mean you have to lose touch.

 

On the other hand, I would certainly say that the overbearing youth culture in the Western World means that elderly care can be truly appalling (there is, I believe, much more value and respect given to the elderly in Eastern cultures) and in the autumn and winter of their lives people can often feel abandoned. No-one is much interested in elderly care.

 

However, it is a mistake to assume that all families are perfect and I welcome the fact that the dark side of family life is neither tolerated nor swept under the carpet these days. The disabled and/or elderly parent behind those doors can be quite capable of being a tyrant. My dental bill bears witness to that fact.

[kvnchrist]

I do not think family ties are any less strong than they were, but the advent of mass media and travel changes the dynamics of those families. It's not uncommon to have branches of a family spread over several continents - mine certainly is. But with Skype and email and stuff like that making communication so much easier, that doesn't mean you have to lose touch.

 

On the other hand, I would certainly say that the overbearing youth culture in the Western World means that elderly care can be truly appalling (there is, I believe, much more value and respect given to the elderly in Eastern cultures) and in the autumn and winter of their lives people can often feel abandoned. No-one is much interested in elderly care.

 

However, it is a mistake to assume that all families are perfect and I welcome the fact that the dark side of family life is neither tolerated nor swept under the carpet these days. The disabled and/or elderly parent behind those doors can be quite capable of being a tyrant. My dental bill bears witness to that fact.

 

 

I'm terribly sorry, I hate tyrants and control freaks. I've got them in my family. I would like to touch on the idea that elderly people are almost forgotten in our society, for the most part. We push them into things called retirement communities, which is another name for a glorified storage shed to warehouse them until they remove themselves from their children's lives.

[Flintlockecole]

Never really had a family myself aside from the great grandparents and a friend of mine. As far as I'm concerned when it comes to the elderly that how the west generally treats them is horrid, retirement homes for one.

[Nintii]

My father was always a stranger to me ... he never even tried ... all i can say is that money isn't love ... love is love.

My mother loved me through thick and thin but by the time I should have loved her back, she passed away .. and on my birthday ... now not a cause for celebration.

My brothers here and overseas are my life now ... but what is left of us is drifting away ...

But they are still my family and I alone am reaching out to them ... I strive to keep us together, is it worth it ? ....... absolutely yes !

 

I have "adopted" other people so to speak as my "extended" family, and they mean a tremendous amount to me but that inner knowing that hidden heart just isn't there ... you know what I mean, there's that something

that love connection that speaks volumes without a sound, that is missing ... with others that is audible but here it is silent it just breathes.

Blood is thicker than water.

[Kendo 2]

I have a scar on the back of neck where my mother hit me with me with an antique buggy whip because I ran out of gas while mowing the yard.

To celebrate my 18th birthday and my leaving home my father and I had a fist fight in the driveway. By the time I left home I could almost whip him. He was the dad in the neighborhood all of the other dads were afraid of.

Both of my sisters left home when they turned 18.

My brother joined the Marine Corp when he was 17. He had rather fight in the jungles of Vietnam than stay home.

 

Is blood thicker than water? My sisters and my brother and I are family. The people who raised us? We didn't go to their funerals.

 

I think 'family' is subjective. It's a state of mind.