We control ourselves or we are controlled

[xenxander]

When I read an article online about one person or another expressing how their lives were destroyed by an MMORPG and how they subsequently got ‘back on track’, there is always a lot of follow-up on it, either in congratulatory commendation or in blatant anger about how it wasn’t the game’s fault and how one should stop finding a scapegoat for their issues / addictions.

 

What I would like to express is not my hate or love for MMORPGs but rather my attitude about the MMORPG community. First I will state that of course it is not the game or the game developers whom are at fault for the life or lives that have been rearranged or ‘ruined’ based on their love / addiction to any particular MMORPG but it is however how these games play out which is the cause of the fault.

 

Everyone who reads this will most likely know that once your MMORPG character reaches the ‘top’ in level and has done every quest / side-quest in the game, and has purchased all available ‘common’ end-game gear / loot, the only thing left to do is ‘raid’. This term has been coined from (as we all know already) spending around twelve hours glued to your account, amassing many (carefully selected) members (up to a cap), to destroy a weekly / monthly NPC spawn that drops a “rare” loot piece (which then has to be distributed, and to manys’ eyes unfairly, among those who helped slay the nearly impossible to defeat NPC).

 

Of course that rare loot piece will make any character who possesses it ‘that much better’ until the next expansion / release from the MMORPG in which a new ‘end game’ NPC is spawned / created and which will drop another end-game loot piece that is highly coveted.

 

I do not write this in anger, merely from an ‘almost’ third-party perspective regarding these types of games. What is this really doing? Well, end game raids probably make up at most (5 – 10)% of the actually MMORPG game, but I will go out on a limb and say that 80% or more of all players are at that last 5% of the game, thus meaning that this “is all there is to do”. This is where the problem lies with these games; in how the end mechanics are treated. Though again any MMORPG developer is in fact, a company, and as such is in the market to make money (when all is said and done, this is it). So the coined phrase “grind” has come about, and this grind is what makes the company its money and keeps people playing. So this ‘end game’ situation will never resolve, because it means there is no way to ‘beat the game’ (good for the company, of course).

 

I know many positive things can come out of these games – namely a community of common interests, friends, good times, good laughter, and good memories.

Brief synopsis:

Both my closest friends used to play “Meridian 59”, in 1995. They absolutely loved it (and even one of the two met his now fiancé from that game :P). Then it grew obsolete with “Underlight”, “Asheron’s Call”, “Everquest”, “World of Warcraft”….

 

Finally my now-engaged friend quit WoW due to his falling college grades and financial crunch, and my first friend quit Wow (but subsequently re-picked up EQ *Shrugs*).

 

I don’t blame the games for this, as I myself am a great gamer. Though I prefer solo games for private immersion - ones in which I can save at any time and do what I need to do (*ehem* meet chicks, go out :P etc etc..)

 

I did briefly pick up Meridian 59 LONG after it was out of grace, and I had to admit it was fun, but it just didn’t ‘click’ in that obsessive way. As such I won’t start down the MMORPG track because I don’t wish to be ‘another statistic’ involved in the ‘end game grind’ that will plague my time and my life.

 

When I had said “and almost 3rd party perspective”, I wrote that because I had gotten involved with an MORPG called “Pardus”. It was ‘supposed’ to be designed for the ‘casual’ gamer, and mechanics were attempted to be balanced out so that one who played 5hrs a week could compete against someone who tried to play all the time, as they introduced an AP system where everything you did cost “AP” and your max AP was at 5000 and recharged at a rate of 24AP / 6min.

 

Sounds good in theory but it means that those who glue to their screens can ‘camp’ the rare NPC spawns and in turn reap the skills that they offer when slain or “farmed”. So when I realized that even free games such as this are plagued by that “grindtastic” factor that states “those who play longer will always be above you”(I even spent 60+ hours making an economic / ship designer spreadsheet for optimal sector management) I quit worrying about the game and removed my account. I don’t regret it.

 

Now, where am I going with all of this? In summary, I do not blame the game industry or any particular company for creating addictive games (It’s a capitalistic world and those who make money survive), I merely state that any MMORPG has the “end game” plague I have mentioned, and as such I find them not worth my time any longer.

 

On a personal note, it’s my experience that those players in-game who are dedicated and devoted in such that ‘gaming’ is a ‘job’, they seem to be (seem to be, mind) young teens with inferiority complexes in the real world, with “superiority complexes” in the game world. Small, out of shape, immature brats who you’d not think twice about slapping upside the head as much as listen to them wine. I know that many adults play too, and I wonder, of those adults who are ‘addicted’- who are guild leaders or otherwise very important members of the game community, if they give a thought that the ones who they are trying to help are these little brats who care only about progressing themselves in the game and always are upset about how things are ‘unfair’ to them and how they never get a break.

 

Also, MMORPGs keep going. The gears keep turning, even if you are not there. This can leave a bittersweet feeling if you were the head of your guild or the controller of your sector economy. Once you’re gone, you’re not missed – someone else will eagerly and hungrily take up your reins… as if you were never there. *sniffles*

[leetgamer]

Indeed, for example : WoW. It's not bad, but you MUST know when to stop. An article :

 

''It's been a while since I've drawn so much flak and fallout as I did from the day-before-yesterday's computer game post. When I told the Melitzer Rebbe about the violent reaction I received from so many people, he said, "The truth often hits in sensitive spots."

 

I always knew that computer games were destructive to a child's Torah learning and spiritual development. I've also helped people deal with cyber-porn addictions. But, a letter I received earlier today shows me just how sheltered and naive I am about the dangers of computer games: Not only do they destroy children's learning, they destroy marriages - especially Orthodox Jewish marriages. That's why computer games should be taboo in a Jewish home, or in any quality home for that matter. "Elaine" from somewhere in California sent me an eye-opening letter complete with pictures and links. Here's what she writes:

 

Dear Rabbi Brody,

 

You don't know how your recent post about computer games hit close to home. I am freshly divorced with two small children to take care of. My tragedy started two short years ago when my husband, an Orthodox Jewish computer programmer that used to make a nice living, pray in a minyan and even learn daf yomi (daily page of Gemorra - LB) with a chevrusa (learning partner - LB), bought a computer game named World of Warcraft. Every few months thereafter, he'd always buy the latest update. It became his whole life.

 

From an hour after work at the beginning, the dreadful game increased until I was going to bed alone every night except on Shabbos. When we first got married 7 years ago, he'd go to the mikva before Shabbos and help with preparations. It got to the point that by last year, he was playing on the computer until 5 minutes before candle-lighting time. When I was pregnant with our second child (now 8 months old), I needed help to roll out a guest bed for my husbands own visiting relatives; I could barely stoop so I called for his help. Shabbos was an hour away, and the guests would soon arrive. My two year old was crying, I was trying to finish setting up the Shabbos thermos, the Shabbos timer, and the hot plate (all on my own of course) and the kitchen was still I mess. I begged for my husband's help. This was his reply:

 

"I can't right now! I'm about to kill the leader of the Hordes...!"

 

I couldn't take it any longer. I nearly had a meltdown. You can imagine what Shabbos was like. My husband and his cousins - also computer game freaks - spoke about the Alliance, the Hordes, gnomes, dead wolves, demons, and soothsayers the entire Shabbos at all three meals. No zmiros, just World of Warcraft. When they talked about killing their enemies, they were frothing at the mouth. My husband was starting to act weird too - rather than reaching for a piece of challa, he'd take a knife and stab it from the bread basket. It was scary.

 

Within another three months, WoW was up to eight hours a day. He was becoming an addict in the worst way. First, he stopped his Torah learning and made an excuse to cancel his chevrusa. Second, he stopped davening mincha and maariv in a minyan. Third, he stopped minyan in the morning and after putting on his tefillin for 4 minutes at home, he'd turn on the computer before work. Two or three nights a week, he'd play all night long for 12 hours straight.

 

Rabbi, don't think I'm ugly; when I was 18, many people said that I could have been a Miss California if I weren't religious. Maybe I could compete with another woman for my husband's love but I gave up competing with The World of Warcraft; my husband has chosen the latter instead of Hashem, his wife, his two children, and now his job. I've been divorced for almost two months and have yet to receive a child-support payment; he lost his job on the 17th of Tammuz because of poor performance. How symbolic - the cursed computer game has destroyed our home, our own little Beis HaMikdash.

 

I'm not asking for sympathy; with Hashem's help, I'll rebuild my life and raise my two sons in Torah with no computer games in the house. Maybe I deserved this punishment because I used to scoff at rabbinical decisions that I didn't like; not any more. When the rabbis prohibited computer games - as you so fearlessly mentioned - they knew what they were doing.

 

Rabbi, I wrote this letter for two reasons: One, if this saves even one other household from a similar fate as mine, then I'll be more than happy, for our sages teach that one who saves a life is like saving a whole world. My ex-husband is today like a dead man - he doesn't listen to his (former) rebbe, to his parents, to an excellent Orthodox psychologist that his parents have hired to help him, or to anyone else. He lives in a fantasy world. Maybe this letter can spare someone else similar anguish. Second, I beg you to continue your courageous stance. I love the way you pursue the truth, even when you fight dangerous and unpopular battles. I thank Hashem for this one ray of truth on the web called Lazer Beams. May Hashem bless you with continued strength and may you be inscribed in the Book of a long and happy Life this Rosh Hashana. With utmost respect, Elaine''

 

This was a letter to a Rabbi... but anyways you get the point...

[batlham]

All I have to say about this...

I have NOT known a person here in real life...that played WoW or Ever-crack occasionally.

Those I know that play one of the games, basically no longer leaves the house, or hangs out with friends.

 

For some reason, there is NEVER moderation. I used to have two friends that did not stop playing untill they lost their jobs and then their houses. Lucky neither of them were married or had kids. Another friend, her first marriage ended because of EverQuest...the second recently because of WoW. Likewise, she no longer bothers having real friends...just virtual friends.

 

I was at the IHOP a month ago. There was a guy with his laptop using the wifi there to play WoW. When his son ended up falling and hurting himself....he didn't even bother to stop playing to check on him. He just let him cry and bleed, to be cared for by the waitress.

WoW is now banned in the IHOP because the manager says "they are nothing but insensitive zombies, that no longer bathes" and he is fed up with them.

 

Why is it that MMORPGs are the only games I have seen affect people this way....

I have not seen this with Halo, Oblivion, GTA, the Wii games, flight sims, or many other games.

 

10+ years ago...I saw it with M.U.D.S.....A text based game sort of like WoW..go around..kill things..get good gear and ignore the real world. In the college computer lab I worked in..I saw many students fail classes because of it.

I even played them, but I never had much fun playing. (Thats another story)

 

So its all nice and dandy to preach about moderation... However, that does nothing to explain WHY people CAN'T stop playing. Likewise, there is never modderation with the players..

 

Should those games be banned?? Sure let the jewish faith ban them. If its what they feel is right.

I think it should be banned from minors. (But then again I think the whole internet should be banned from minors.)

The game has proven over and over how harmful it is to relationships and the players long term well being. More harmful than a shoot them up game like GTA.

[TheTerminator2004]

I think the reason so many people become addicted to traditional MMOs such as WoW and EQ is because they're designed to be addictive. The developers want as many people to play for as long as possible, because that makes them more money. Not all MMOs are like this; EVE Online is one that is not especially addictive, and manages to get people to stay subscribed without actually needing to play as much (this is mostly thanks to the real-time skill training system, and the fact that even a character a couple of days old can be just as useful as a character who's been playing for years). There is a reason why the only MMO I play, and have ever played, is EVE - I cant stand the traditional, addictive, grind-based model, for the very reasons mentioned above. Paying monthly to become addicted to something which, after a few months isn't even fun any more just doesn't appeal to me.

 

I think a good way to describe them is to say they're like drugs... designed specially to be as addictive as possible, so the creators can get as much money as possible, and with sometimes devastating long-term effects...

[leetgamer]

Or the simplest answer, like you said: It's designed to be addictive for more money AND it constantly is upgraded for the game never to end. Thats what MMORPG's are.

[Vagrant0]

What ever happened to simply having self control. There are many people who are able to maintain complete and productive lives outside of these games, but you don't hear anything about them. You can certainly play these games and not be an addict willing to give up life, work, and all that is important just to play these games. The problem isn't the game, but rather the people for never learned how to have some control over their behaviors, or society for allowing people who have little to no control over their actions be in a place of responsibility. People should be taught to avoid excess in schools, by parents, or through whatever religion they practice (Afterall nearly all major religions preach this concept in their writings). Which contrasts with the view of how games shouldn't be allowed in a house where faith is practiced. If there were following with scriptures and teachings, they wouldn't get addicted, or would be able to stop once they were. I highly doubt that anyone in that state hasn't been made aware of their problem, either from friends, or by missing out on important parts of life. This leads me to believe that some of those instances mentioned were put together with an ulterior motive. One of trying to shut down part of the game industry that one person seems to have a problem with. When you really think about it, nearly all of these similar messages about the "evils of MMOs" are trying to place the blame on the game companies, and remove blame from people who were around the victim, or the victim themselves.

 

The reason why MMOs seem so addictive is not particularly because they are designed that way. When Everquest (the first one) was released it was not expected that so many people would become slaves to the game. The addictiveness of MMOs come from their sense of community and accomplishment. People are allowed to reinvent themselves as the hero or villan, interact with others in a way which is not limited by real world issues, and can gain that sense of achievement that is vacant from their real lives. Most of these people who you hear getting addicted are people who are severely lacking something in their real lives, who decide to turn to the online world to get fulfilled. People don't smoke crack because it's highly recommended or marketed right, they smoke crack because it gives them an excape from their miserable, often lonely lives. You'll never be able to keep crack and other drugs off the street, but you can give people a reason not to get involved with them, or in the case of minor drugs, use them responsibly. It's only when people overdo it do these problems occur.

[xenxander]

Isn't it odd though, that those who are 'lacking' something in their lives (who are the addicts to the MMORPGs) are in some cases those who some consider 'lucky'.

 

Married to a lovely wife, a well-paying job, children, their own home - all of these factors they already have and yet here they are, glued to their accounts because they are 'incomplete'.

 

This lack of self-satisfaction perhaps can be traced to a feeling of self-doubt. they have what the were after in life and now are not sure it's what they wanted. So in turn they 'ruin' their lives by giving just about everything up for a fantasy existence.

 

Growing up I was the child everyone picked on - I was no good in sports (and thus grew to hate them) and couldn't skateboard very well (nor did I know much about things that interested most of the other kids). I would play games as a way to escape reality - nearly obsessively (but as mentioned, being obsessive about games or gaming isn't the same as being addicted to them ^_^)

 

Later, as most do when they grow up, I developed more self-confidence and had less of a desire to escape reality (though that's the point of playing games and thus why I still play). Now, where am I going with this? it's easy to put down a game and give it up if you are aware that you're going to lose something (which I wager these people are, they just 'don't care').

 

So to me, these people have mental issues which should be dealt with probably by professional council. I have no sympathy for these addicts and as I have explained, I do not blame the games themselves, yet it is true that MMORPG companies do try and make their games 'never ending' to keep people playing (and paying) for them. I get upset at this, but that's the two faces of Capitalism, and it can't be fixed, so it just has to be dealt with.

[Duskrider]

Hm. Surprisingly, a post a very wise and brilliant person once wrote is still here: http://thenexusforums.com/index.php?showto...hy+mmorpgs+suck

 

Read that, and then you'll realize that the problem is lazy game designers, not any inherent problem with the MMORPG concept.

 

 

As for the supposed religious objections, they're just laughable, to the point I really think whoever wrote that is just a fraud. It's just such a painfully obvious attempt at manipulating members of the religion into thinking MMORPGs are bad. If it isn't, why the focus on the specifically religious aspects of their family that lost? Surely "my husband won't take any responsibility for our family" is enough, if it's really a legitimate problem? But instead, the author brings up religious reference after religious reference... the reason is obvious, rather than focusing on difficult family issues (that would require more than "RAR, ban the video games!!!" to fix), he turns it into a case of sacrilege (or whatever the word you people use for it, I can never remember which is which) and goes for the reflexive emotional reaction. How dare he offend god! Who cares if he abandoned his family for WoW, what really counts is his duty to god!

 

 

 

The simple fact is MMORPGs are no more inherently destructive than any other social activity. People were finding ways to ignore their families/school/etc long before MMORPGs were invented, and they'll be doing the exact same thing long after MMORPGs are a distant memory. If you have the kind of personality that makes you fall victim to addictions like that, it doesn't matter what the specific addiction is. If there's no MMORPG, you'll end up drinking, gambling, watching football all the time, whatever it happens to be. On the other hand, if you don't have the general psychological problem, MMORPGs are no threat, you'll have no problem playing them as time allows.

 

The only difference here is MMORPGs are newer and less widespread than the traditional addictions. They're still limited to a narrow enough section of society that people can point to gamers and say "I can't understand these strange people! Who would ever want to play a game like that??". Meanwhile the guy who says that spends his paycheck on a case of beer and spends the whole weekend watching football while his poor family is neglected. Or he works 90 hours a week, giving his family lots of money, but none of the stuff that really matters. But nobody cares and bothers to make a news story out of it, because it's just old news. Everyone's seen lives ruined by the old stuff, and they don't care anymore.