1.) There are a few mods that perform mass edits on faces, the most popular and all-encompassing of which would probably be Xenius Character Enhancement. Makes a lot of edits to faces to make some general adjustments. If you're looking for gender-specific ones, obviously there are going to be a lot aimed at female characters and far fewer for males, but personally I enjoy Better Females by Bella (I use the non-makeup version as some of these are quite caked) and Geonox's high res face maps for men (one of my favs - it makes a REALLY big difference IMO). You can use these and Xenius's mod together, though I would reccomend installing Xenius first and then following up with the other two and overwriting whatever from XCE they need to. There are also good mods for better looking beast races as well which I can reccomend if you're interested. 2.) I use an athletic body mod for females called Athletic Nude Women. It's not over the top but it's not too subtle to be unnoticeable, and despite the name, you actually can choose a version with underwear and it's compatible with vanilla body meshes. 3.) It's hard to say what mods are compatible with others since there are SO many, but generally speaking, if you keep your face mods gender-specific and stick to one for each, there shouldn't be issues. I reccomend XCE because it takes care of some of the smaller tweaks that the gender-specific mods sometimes don't cover. It seems we have similar tastes -- I enjoy realism and I don't indulge much in flowy amazonesque faces and perfect bodies, so I think you will find what you're looking for in these reccomendations.