Keanumoreira Posted February 1, 2011 Share Posted February 1, 2011 Crisp dew moons and sunset lands,Fields of flowers grasped by sands.Velvet shined waters and towers of rock,Gathers of feathers in nimble and flock. Timbers of brass and sheets of green,Shy horizons yet to be seen.Scorching dunes and bricks of stone,Skeleton warriors endless at drone. Flowers at heel and stars at head,Gusts at whisper reluctant to bed.Dawn to awaken, a day left to drew,Dusk to settle, memories reviewed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheSwedishPancake Posted February 2, 2011 Share Posted February 2, 2011 I like it! Great, clear imagery; it feels like I really know what's going on, which is more than I can say for a lot of poems. If I would change one thing, it would be, again, the rhythm. That's always the hardest part, isn't it? Keep it up; these are great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keanumoreira Posted February 2, 2011 Author Share Posted February 2, 2011 I like it! Great, clear imagery; it feels like I really know what's going on, which is more than I can say for a lot of poems. If I would change one thing, it would be, again, the rhythm. That's always the hardest part, isn't it? Keep it up; these are great. Yes, at times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deleted54170User Posted February 4, 2011 Share Posted February 4, 2011 I rambled through every word without a stop. The vision of poetic painting, maps, and sites and sounds for all that it is worth is what I sought. Your description is well to be read twice and is better with each slice of Kiwi Lime Pie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keanumoreira Posted February 4, 2011 Author Share Posted February 4, 2011 Thank you Pagafyr. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Netwit2008 Posted February 16, 2011 Share Posted February 16, 2011 That is really beautiful Keanu! I didn't know you had the heart of a poet. Very nicely done, poignant, rich in imagery. I'm glad you shared it! :thumbsup: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keanumoreira Posted February 16, 2011 Author Share Posted February 16, 2011 Oh thank you Netwit. :) Yeah, I kinda do poetry here and there. Still working at it though... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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