Why am I so bored?

[Daiyus]

I don't normally do things like this, but I'm almost at crisis point and I'm hoping writing something down might help me.

 

I've always struggled to fit into the world. I've never like humanity, never wanted to engage with the majority of people. I have a few close friends, even have a wife and child, but ultimately I find myself just wanting to left alone most of the time. I find myself doing things for the sake of doing them rather than for any element of enjoyment even when I am left alone. Games used to provide a distraction from life but now I can't even bring myself to do that. I sit at my computer and wonder "what's the point?".

 

I've been through three types of counselling. I've been on and off medication (got an appointment to go back on soon). My marriage is broken; I just feel trapped by my responsibilities. My work doesn't get done because I just can't be bothered. If it weren't for my daughter I'd have probably done something drastic by now like moving or travelling but I can't. I can't do anything. My ex-wife has two severe mental illnesses meaning she cannot cope with being a single parent or even being left alone. I have to be there, and she won't let me take my daughter by myself either. I feel like I'm forever trapped. I can't just decide to go for drinks with friends. I can't start any hobbies because it's a month long debate to get the time.

 

What the hell do I do? I'm just so fed up with my life, but I don't want my daughter to grow up without me.

[Deleted54170User]

Ah! I must have arrived too late to share. Sorry, if you missed the original text I posted.

 

And if you did go out and get away for awhile, because you seem a bit peeved today, I hope you came to your sense's before you wandered outside the borders of your civilized community only to find the wild life communities have been pushed even further into smaller areas where crops, livestock, and food for human consumption have forced them, the wild life, to live.

 

Have great peeved day! Or not?

[greatdarius]

it seams you are a bit tired of life , you are loosing a point that its only yourself that can help you . try learning for example cooking , or playing an instrument like an agustic guitar . traveling was the best choice but because your situation you can't now . there are many tutorials on YouTube to learn and try not to play games for a while cause I think u are just full of it.

[brokenergy]

I think you need to dedicate your time in helping yourself because with what you just said on your opening, you could be going through something bad yourself. The best advise I can give you is to talk to your friends and family about what's going on with your life, build a strong support network and look into doing small little changes in your routine. For example, try singing in the shower or cook something new or exercise. Small little steps that you can change every once in the while can make major differences in your life.

[Daiyus]

Thanks for all the tips. I'm feeling a bit calmer now. I've discussed Mt feelings with my friends and family and arranged to start a martial arts class, alongside digging my guitar out. I think I just needed to reconnect with things that I wanted to do instead of what is expected of me.

 

I'm still not feeling particularly great, but I do feel like things are getting better instead of worse.

[Deleted54170User]

Yay! Digging into the heap of our past dreams in the closest, among the mold and mildew, may reveal your true calling, again, but from my experience, it is the lack of a challenge which really sets the mood like the one you're in.

 

Guitar? Sounds like you need a real fighters style challenge. I recommend a, "Sitar".