COLD METAL

[Lisnpuppy]

I lay on metal

staring up

shadowed figures and masked faces

cold hands connecting tubes

and wires

and tape

the light blinds

the smells bite the back of my throat

there are voices around me

I try to hear the beeps

I fear

I shiver

warm blankets then cover me

I feel the tightness of the cuff

the needle in my arm

now the cold flows

I hear buzzing

the light bends

I am………………

 

(Author note—this is basically my state-of-mind when laying upon the operating table. The next thing after the line “I am….” is me waking up several hours later in recovery room.)

[gandalftw]

I lay on metal

staring up

shadowed figures and masked faces

cold hands connecting tubes

and wires

and tape

the light blinds

the smells bite the back of my throat

there are voices around me

I try to hear the beeps

I fear

I shiver

warm blankets then cover me

I feel the tightness of the cuff

the needle in my arm

now the cold flows

I hear buzzing

the light bends

I am………………

 

(Author note—this is basically my state-of-mind when laying upon the operating table. The next thing after the line “I am….” is me waking up several hours later in recovery room.)

Very descriptive.Brought back memories of my eye operations.I was shivering as well and they got me a warm blanket.I was out the first time for only a few minutes.

The second time they forgot to put me out lol.I didn't tell them so i knew what was going the whole time.It was for cataracts in both eyes.I have implants now and have to wear glasses.It was the first hospital visit for me so i was quite nervous.Even tho they kept telling me that the operation was a simple one, my brain kept telling me,i want to get OUT of here.

The mechanical sounds around me didn't help either.Hope you're better now.

[Lisnpuppy]

I am both happy and sad that you can relate to this.

And I am as good as I get...thanks for that. I have experienced this little scenerio a time or 50.

It doesnt get easier....but writing helps.

 

:)

[gandalftw]

I am both happy and sad that you can relate to this.

And I am as good as I get...thanks for that. I have experienced this little scenerio a time or 50.

It doesnt get easier....but writing helps.

 

:)

You're welcome.

Writing is therapeutic they say.I used to write a lot in the past,i still have a slew of notebooks of poetry and prose i wrote.I even

tried my hand at story writing a time or two.Lost one i had spent a lot of time on in a computer crash. :wallbash:

Caused me to realize that people make external backups for a reason.Duh..... :wacko:

[josh900]

i wish my trips to the operating table were as peaceful as yours sound. there's more screaming, yelling,and pain before my surgeries.but the painkillers after it to make it better ;D.i hope you weren't there for anything serious.

[Lisnpuppy]

i wish my trips to the operating table were as peaceful as yours sound. there's more screaming, yelling,and pain before my surgeries.but the painkillers after it to make it better ;D.i hope you weren't there for anything serious.

 

Not peaceful at all...but after like 50 something I am used to it! LOL

[josh900]

50!!!wow you've got me beat.i've only had 19.but yeah after awhile you do get used to it. it's your family doesn't.i think it's kind of funny when they're telling you that "it's going to be okay"when they look like they could all faint at any moment.

[Aeryn333]

LisnpuppyPosted Yesterday, 11:38 PMNot peaceful at all...but after like 50 something I am used to it! LOL

After reading this poem earlier today, I figured I'd give it time to sit and stew a while before saying something.

Any time someone puts anything down thats of a personal nature,and allows others to read it, to me shows not only courage,but heart and soul as well. When you share experiences like those that you've experienced it shows also matuity of mind, the ability to take your fears and set them out for others to see shows how remarkable you are. We all have things that have happened to us,and sometimes we let those things sit buried away,hoping and praying that they'll never see the light of day. For me and for you Lisnpuppy,and Aeryn and myrmaad, josh and some others,we find relief in giving those things up to be brought to the surface, for when we confront our demons, they lose power over us.

Well done, a goddess is, as a goddess does!

 

Eh Dani, that brings back many memories for me also..Courageous personal share Dani..Dani knows like her I have seen to many+ operation tables..and 3+ to many near death expierences..yet we're still ticking..with good days and bad..eh la..

Bravo for sharing Dani....well done..

 

Well said Dezi..it is scary to share knowing when you do, its up for grabs by others..But your right its also like no matter come what may, a weight is lilted, and you come out of the shadows..feeling lighter..la

To share our, joys and I likes is easy..Tis much harder to show our shadows our held to the chest, things for so long, to finally expose them regardless of the conseguences..Is a good thing..

As Dezi said, that which is brought to the light is dis-empowered no matter what anyone does or says..What is that old song...

"I decided long ago never to walk in anyones shadows ..If I fail, if I succeed, at least I lived as I believe...No matter what they take from me, they can't take away my diginity..........For the greatest love of all lives inside of me.."

To all the daring goddesses of this forum all the ones Dezi mentioned..and her own dear self also..each in our way..Blessed be..

 

I wish Dani that you did not have to know such pain, for I all to well know how it feels..Sister..