My First Story

[Gamerbird]

This is my first ever story that hasn't been for something at school. Please tell me what you think and what I could improve.

WARNING - It is a dark story so if things like that worry you then please do not read.

 

It struck 3:25pm. I thought to myself '5 more minutes and I can go home for summer'.

We were in double Mathematics. Mr Jones was boring the class with his equations and algebra.

To my right was my friend Joseph, asleep, laying on his book. To my left was the new girl.

She had a certain emptyness about her, as if she was never in the room, as if she was in her own world.

The bell rang. Without a care in the world, the class jumped out of there chairs.

Before Mr Jones could get a word in, the class had rushed through the door to get home.

 

I can remember thinking to myself 'I can get home and just lounge about and have fun'.

How wrong I was.

As I walked through the alley way to reach my house, police cordened off my house.

'Please citizen, move away from the area'.

 

I remember mentioning to the officer that I lived here. This is when my life was about to change. Forever.

They let me in to my home. The kitchen window had been smashed and cutlery was strewn around.

I looked on the dining table. A knife, covered in blood, lying on the edge of the table, the blood dripping to the floor.

 

The Chief came in my house and walked in to the Kitchen.

'Your mother has been arrested on account of murder'.

'What? My mother would never commit murder? Or would she?' I thought to myself as I pulled a chair out.

 

My mother enjoyed watching crime investigation shows like 'Wire In The Blood' and 'A Touch Of Frost'.

Anytime we saw something about murder on the news, she would say how sick it was and how the person should be treated just how they treated the victim.

So why would she do such a thing?

Why would my mother commit murder?

There was still some questions that needed to be answered.

Who did she kill?

Why did she kill them?

 

I couldn't bring myself to ask these questions before the chief asked me if I wished to she my mother.

I promptly nodded as he took me to the police station. There she was, behind 5 inch glass, so I was safe.

She had a crazed look in her eye, she looked as if she wanted to murder me and all living beings.

I always thought the only person crazy enough to kill someone would be Crazy Catherine who lived 2 streets away from me.

I heard stories of her knocking on peoples doors early in the morning saying to people that she was being watched.

Saying that her food had been poisened.

Nothing ever came off that though.

 

I decided to leave the room, leaving my mother to face what she had done.

I made my way back home thinking of what could of caused her to do such a hideous act but worst of all, if they had found a body.

As I reached my house, I approached the Police Chief.

I can recall the exact words I said to him.

'Has......has a body been found?'

'The forensics team are still searching your house for a body.'

 

I decided to take matters in to my own hands.

As the Forensics team left my home, I entered and started searching my house.

I entered my parents room. Nothing. It looked exactly as I last saw it.

I walked in to my room, exactly the same as I had left it that morning.

 

As I walked towards my sisters room the floorboards creaked.

They had never done that before here. So what had changed?

As I lifted up the carpet covering the floorboards, I noticed one of them was loose.

I pulled up the board and there it was, the body.

The body was my fathers.

I can remember falling to my knees, crying.

 

I quickly left my house and made a move towards the Station.

By this time night had set in. The moon shining bright down on me, illuminating the ground I stood upon.

The trees were casting shadows across the street.

 

As I reached the Station, the last of the visitors were entering.

I entered and approahced my mothers cell.

I asked them if I could enter, and they accepted.

As I walked in, I quickly swiped the wardens 9mm pistol without him noticing.

 

As they closed the door to the cell, I pulled out the pistol and aimed towards my mothers heart.

'You shouldn't of done what you did. You morals have changed and you have gone against the laws of humanity'.

I slowly pulled the trigger.

As it fired I can remember thinking to myself 'Doing this, I have become a monster as sinful as her'.

As the bullet ripped in to her chest, she fell to the floor.

The Warden started to unlock the door, as I aimed the pistol to my head.

The Warden quickly opened the door as I smirked at him.

I pulled the trigger.

 

Tuesday 11th February 2006, the day before my birthday, the day three people had been lost to the darkness.

If you only take one thing away from my tale, then take this.

As you move closer to the light, the greater your shadow becomes.

[josh900]

cool aaron :thumbsup:that was good.

[Gamerbird]

Thanks Josh!

I might find my English coursework that I did and post that soon as well, I got a B for it so I suppose its good.

[wasder]

Good! You have a screwed up mind though.

[Gamerbird]

Lol Wasder. My coursework is more dark than this though.

 

I can't believe I came up with a decent good thing to quote for this though.

'The closer you get to the light, the greater your shadow becomes'.

[wasder]

I may have to wright my own story at some point. It will probably be ES based, I'd imagine.

That is quite a good quotable line there, like proverb or something. :thumbsup:

[dezdimona]

cool,I enjoyed it!

[exanimis]

Very well done

 

@wasder

That's what they said about Anne Rice, Steven King, Alfred Hitchcock and quite a few others

[Gamerbird]

Thank you to you all!

 

Stephen King is one great author! I love the 'Dark Tower' Series.

[wasder]

You know I said I'd write a story, probably ES based? Well I've just finished the first installement. I think It's far too long and a bit crappy.