Sniperwhere Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 The story sounds great, but the chapters are a tad to short. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gamerbird Posted December 24, 2008 Author Share Posted December 24, 2008 I know they are short chapters but I decided to put them in to chapters so you would know what the part is about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sniperwhere Posted December 27, 2008 Share Posted December 27, 2008 Ah, I see. Well then. I'll be looking out for chapter 3. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gamerbird Posted January 11, 2009 Author Share Posted January 11, 2009 Chapter 3 - The Cell It took three years for them to build the base of the project.Top security, no one gets in without authority, no one gets out.From the town of Shendo, the trip takes 10 hours.The man was asleep when they arrived. They had no respect for him.They just pulled him out of the jeep by his feet.Threw him to the ground, breaking his nose. The team dragged him in to the base, scraping his feet along the floor.The floor was slowly being covered in the blood dripping from his nose.Armed guards were standing infront of the 10 foot high doors.As they approached the base, the doors opened, letting the heat rush out from the building. It took 5 minutes to drag him to what looked like a court room.One man stood behind a glass wall, talking in to a microphone.'You have been brought here on account of harming another human'.'You will have your penalty, this will last for three months'.'Take him away to the first punishment'. The officers drag him to a padded room, that already had someone in there.She had a large whip, waiting for her victim.Not long after the officers had dumped the offender in the cell, they shut the door.All that could be heard for many hours was the scream of a man in pain. After the hours of pain, the doors were opened, allowing the man to crawl out of the cell, not being able to stand because of the lashes on his legs.He was covered in blood from where he had been hit with the whip, the only place left was his head.He was lifted to his feet by the officers and taken away.They took him to a cell for him to rest the night.It was merely a few feet away from the second punishment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
josh900 Posted January 11, 2009 Share Posted January 11, 2009 pretty good aaron.noticed that it was longer than the others. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gamerbird Posted January 11, 2009 Author Share Posted January 11, 2009 More of the chapters are going to be longer now :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Azura Posted January 12, 2009 Share Posted January 12, 2009 I love this!Keep up with great work! :biggrin: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alex2avs Posted January 12, 2009 Share Posted January 12, 2009 Great ! What was she (Maybe the wrath itself ? )Anyway...Keep up the good workWaiting for the next chapters Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gamerbird Posted January 12, 2009 Author Share Posted January 12, 2009 Thanks for the comments! Also Alex, I am keeping my mouth shut about the story :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alex2avs Posted January 12, 2009 Share Posted January 12, 2009 Thanks for the comments! Also Alex, I am keeping my mouth shut about the story :) Hmm...that proves that I can predict the future ,since i know that you would say that ..that also means... :whistling: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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