karkarinus

"Let us depart, M'lady."Says Kalmer presently, feeling suddenly and inexplicably inclined to leave that place, as if he had left something behind. "We should first agroup some of our manservants before heading for the Temple." The two glide as gracefully as possible through the party-goers, respectfully thanking the Ranee for her kind hospitality. Nearing their lodgings, Kalmer and T'Skar simultaneously adopt more a stealthier, more cautious gait and from several yards away espy two suspicious-looking characters loitering nearby. One seems to be picking something out of his left leg in a rather unseemly manner. Kalmer catches a glimpse of a rather ordinary-looking grey cat slipping in through the door of the lodgings. Too ordinary, he thinks to himself. Most unlike the uncomely ginger things that seem so common around here. He emits a short meow reminiscent of these ginger cats, so as too call the grey cat outside once again.

Phwak! Right in the Smalleys. Size 69, latex feather with hassles. I gnu that toaster, and the one quite fond of it. Rupert Dismay, the man I had beat up for the roll-off Tiny Tim..... oh God, I think I'm gonna faint.... As the light fades from the screen of Stuart's famous final scene, the set takes on a wan and poignant hue, with surrealistic undertones both dizzying and macabre. Something odd is happening... a world not akin to our own is rapping on the very doors of sanity. The set spins, his head reels, and all at once he finds himself.......

Kalmer takes a step forward from where he was 'hovering' and addresses Arminda Sagrami: "Forgive my intrusion, Lady Sagrami, but Lady Taskara really has no need for monetary remuneration, do you, Ma'am?" He turns to T'Skar, glancing sidelong towards Sagrami. "Why, her only financial outlay ever has been this holiday by the seaside!" He gives a haughty laugh. "No, surely we can come to some other arrangment, Ma'am? Perhaps something by way of thanks rather than payment per se. Something that Lady Taskara would treasure more than wealth - the joy of a new experience, and at the same time the chance to do a good deed. What say we pay a visit to the Temple and see if we can't fathom the mystery of those whispers? A good deal all round, what?" Kalmer ends jocularly.

Just finished "Past Mortem" by Ben Elton. Up till 4 am this morning, unable to put it down! Well worth reading. I will now move on to The Dying Earth series by Jack Vance.

(EDIT, Reason: somewhat unsavoury, so to speak) ...several of their diners had been closed down due to rat infestation, which gave him a rather interesting idea:

ooc> Sorry (again) for the delay ic> "That is has, Ma'am." Declares 'Kalwen' in an austere tone as he approaches the two ladies. He is carrying something wrapped in an ornate burgundy cloth. Your beauticians have just finished another jar of ointment, Lady Taskara. It is nearly time."

...pile of spam that he had found on an internet thread somewhere. Being British, he had been brought up on spam, but he loathed it nonetheless, and decided not to give it a second thought. Outside in the street, it was a dank, Bladerunneresque evening. He set off for the first of the bereaved homesteads, tapping his handheld GPS and inanely pointing it at the sky, as if that was going to help. Presently,.....

"Past Mortem" by Ben Elton. For those of you who've never heard of him, he is an English comedian responsible for writing series such as Blackadder. As a comedian I can't stand him, but he really excels as a writer of comedy. In this book, he combines a murder investigation with a reasonable dose of good old British humour. I've only just started, but I get the feeling it's going to be a bit like "The Gun Seller" by Hugh Laurie, which I think I mentioned here several months ago. i.e. good stuff :)

"Then we are in company, friend!" Says Kalmer, lightening up a little. "I, too, am an archer and tracker, though I am more at home in arid climes than in the cold. Well met!" He turns as the other come out of the shop. "Come, fellows. We should head back to the Ranee's place and pick up 'Lady Taskara'." As they near the Ranee's party, Kalmer once again adopts his 'Prime Courtier' gait, and bows courteously to those at the entrance as he goes in to find T'Skar. The others of course have to wait outside. "I will not be long."

"I am Kalmer Naowen of Tagfier. Almost one year ago we were brought here to Bashkher as you have been, and were charged with a quest by Bharat Desani. We have travelled far, and yet I fear our quest is far from over. We have since lost companions and gained others. Of our original group only T'Skar, Tiax and I remain, so we welcome newcomers - as long as they can prove their good intentions. That you have been sent by Bharat is endorsement enough. It appears one recent arrival, Aldhelm, was also brought here, but for a different purpose, and all his companions would seem to have been lost. We have mutually agreed to help each other in our respective quests, which curiously seem to be intertwined at some points. "Forgive my abrupt entry and coarse action, but the people of this world know nothing of our procedence - nor even of the existence of other countries. To much curiosity is not a good thing. There are too few who can help us, and even fewer whom we can trust. Tell me of your abilities and persuasion, friend."

A sharp (yet inconspicuous) jab in the ribs silences the dark-haired newcomer, and leaves him somewhat bewildered as to where it came from. "Ha hah, that's a good one, Sir!" Exclaims Kalmer in a jocular fashion. "Groups of adventurers, you say? Well, they've come to the right place if they want to go unnoticed - there are more tourists in Ippikander than locals! Come, walk with me!" He gives the man a piercing, shut up and come with me look, and gently but firmly ushers him out of the shop. Aldhelm, Tiax and Áni seem to get the idea, and carry on as before. Once outside, Kalmer apologises for his manner, and explains that he did not want to attract unwanted attention to themselves, nor indeed to the geographical procedence of the new arrival. "Who sent you, friend? Was it Bharat? What is your name, and where are you from?"

(ooc > Malchik, can you write Kalmer back in at the Beach Palace Hotel to meet Abramul? Thanks)

I've never been that impressed with Motörhead. To me (and this is just my opinion) they always seem so... bland. I've also never been a fan of how the vocalist sounds. If you've been a big fan and this album saddens you I am sorry to hear that. :( No, it doesn't sadden me as such. I just always found them great fun hard rock'n'roll, and I think the fun has gone now. I shan't be losing sleep over it. Thanks awfully for your concern though :P

Motörhead's 2006 album "Kiss of Death." Not that impressed, really. They sound great (kind of gruffer, if that's possible) but the creativity seems to have waned. Shame really :(

"To whom do you refer, good sir?" Enquires Kalmer to the green-haired man in a courteous, yet quizzical manner. "In what way are they 'complacent', andwhat exactly do you mean by 'shaking them up'?"

So bestiality is the new topic, then? :rolleyes: And necrophilia. Necrobestiality. Hmmm... Curiouser and curiouser :P

That'd be one mighty queer-lookin' Trollhunter!

So that means.... Pov has visited it at least TWICE! Oh, the shame! I think I'm going all bumpy. I have vowed never again to click on that link. *additional prolonged mumbling to fill up a bit more space*

Dark0ne has said it all. We were not gay-bashing, rather crap-site-bashing. All in good jest. Hee hee. And FYI I spent no more than 14 seconds perusing said site; more than enough for me to realise that it is possibly the tackiest, most pointless example of online forum activity to ever have tainted my 19" TFT. I most certainly was not casting aspersions upon the sexual persuasion of its participants, and any allusions to "effeminacy" were directed at the general appearance of the site, not the forum-goers. >BUMP<

The queerness of Gaia Online has tripled in the past six months. Gosh, so it has! Oddly enough.

I hardly see the importance of pronouncing something that I am never likely to give a second thought to in the rest of my life. Kinda like the previous post. Will not respond to flaming.

Bump. Oops. Can this stuff be allowed? I feel dirty and kind of.... shrivelly. Eewww. And the"queer" thing, well, the site's called "Gaia" and it's kind of ickily emfeminate so anyone who frequents it must be "weird" to say the least.

.... You cannot go in that direction. D You cannot go in that direction. LOOK You are standing in a small glade in the middle of the forest. Roads lead off to the North, South, East, West and Northwest. There is a Shrimp here. TAKE SHRIMP You cannot take the Shrimp. .... Suddenly the Shrimp leaps up and cleaves your skull with one fell swoop. You are dead. Type "RESTART" to play again. Rubbing his eyes, the British businessman switched of his laptop, and turned his attention for the first time to the matter in hand. Not once had it occurred to him that anyone from outside his cosy little islet might have something useful to say, but by now it was too late. The delegates.....

ooc> lol, Oops, sorry :blush:

Kalmer glances sidelong at Áni, with a hint of both satisfaction and caution. He is pleased at the Barbarian's ability to remain concentrated on the job in hand, but wary that his response to the servant's question might raise unwanted questions. All the while, he is keeping an ever-watchful eye out for any sign of wrong-doing amongst this sudden spate of apparent confusion. "A courtier's work is never done, child." He says to Tiax's admirer. "Though any brief periods of repose are conceded at the whim of Lady Taskara." (ooc> awaitng responses from others)