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A never ending story


Gabbemaster

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Long journey to Firieo 12, a planet consisting of frozen jungles and semi-active volcanoes (please don't ask me how it got that way, it's a long story). Leif and James had compared their notes on the trade routes of various Spacial Empires (including but not limited to The Space Lobster and Crab United Army, The Space Guar Empire, The Dankinorr and The Feyioes), the amount of unrefined space ship fuel on the planet and the economics of running an outlaw planet. They soon agreed that this planet would be a good place to set up a refueling depot for their fellow space pirates/vikings pillaging in the area. So James called on his buddy Captain Silver 'Long' John (who had recently 'acquired' some fuel drilling and refining equipment) of the SS Lovely Lady and Leif called on his numerous kinsmen and they all blasted off to Firieo 12, ready to blow up/commandeer/loot anybody who got in their way.......
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The undead were defeated and the Intergalactic Canadian Lumberjacks joined the Space pirates/vikings.

So they all landed on Firieo 12, each with their own motive:

James wanted to make ridiculous amounts of money from a refueling station for space pirates/vikings.

John wanted to get the heavy fuel drilling and refining equipment off his ship and make a profit.

Leif wanted to provide his kinsmen employment.

Veronica wanted to be the first woman to set foot on Firieo 12.

Bubba wanted to eat the furry monkeys he had heard about..

George 'Beaver' Cleaver and his Intergalactic Canadian Lumberjacks wanted to clear cut the entire planet's frozen jungles, but they also wanted to plant a tree seed for every tree they cut down so that by thew time they had cut the whole forest down, new trees would've grown back. It would be an endless cycle of cutting planting and growing!!!! So they all worked together to build the fuel extractor and when they were done.......

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...but destroying the forest was a foolish act. A legion of murderous, rabid squirrels devoured all of them, enraged by the senseless destruction of their homes. They drowned James in a lake of his own oil, they used John's drilling equipment against him, and slaughtered the rest of the pioneers with a barricade of thorns.

 

The squirrels then seized the technology amassed by the Space pirates and began their own civilization, which specialized in exporting socks to other planets and...

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...killed millions of earth squirrels before deciding to ally against the common foe... HUMANS!!! so together they founded the Galactic Squirrel Army Federation of Super Bad Horror or GSAFSBH for a little shorter. then with Foamy & Chuck Norris the-squirrel-with-a-weird-(and vaguely familiar)-name as the king of earth squirrels continued their reign of terror but then...
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