Rubbish B+ story I wrote.

[katashy]

Short story I wrote for English, which I got a B+ for :D . It’s badly written and the story isn't very strong, but I thought I should post it.

If people like it enough, I’ll write some more?

 

EDIT: The symbols haven't appeared... Ill remedy that later.

 

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It’s been two weeks since the infection came. At first it was just “Swine Flu”, but... something happened. The virus mutated with “Avian flu”, which together, formed some kind of airborne mutagen, “Scinox”. At first, there were only a few cases, and the victims were “contained” in high-tech labs in obscure, back-of-beyond military installations, which were thought to be completely safe and break-out free. How wrong they were...

Due to a system malfunction, one of the infected escaped unnoticed. Until it managed to wipe the entire village of Runcorn, when it was found and killed, but it was killed too late. The villagers mutated into savage, beast like creatures and in a matter of hours, mutated and wiped out half of Great Britain. The military was taken by shock and was too slow to respond. When they did respond, they were overwhelmed by the number of infected, that they were effectively useless.

It’s been two weeks since the infection came. The infected have wiped out all major cities and towns, and only a few isolated areas have been unaffected. Giffnock is one of these areas. Located in Scotland, away from the big, infected cities, the people of Giffnock had time to prepare for the inevitable onslaught of mutants. Scavenging spare materials, weapons, ammo and vehicles, the survivors fortified themselves inside Woodfarm High school. The school was built on a hill and had big, open spaces surrounding it. The people barricaded windows and doors, got the generator working, built fortified bunkers in classrooms, and got ready.

 

The first attack came at 3:51Pm. The look-outs spotted a figure in the distance, recognised it as an infected, and used their scavenged sniper to kill it. Bad move. The infected were alerted of the humans’ location, and like a swarm of crazed wasps, ran in a frenzy at the school. The survivors moved quickly, taking up arms and manning the scavenged Vulcan Minigun on the roof. The gun had only around 4000 rounds, which would only provide around a minute of fire. It fired at the crazed infected, cutting them down, but after that minute of fire, the ammo had run dry. The people with guns fired at the “zombies” with little effect. They were bad at aiming and for every infected they killed; it was like three more had taken its place.

The people were lucky, it just so happened a platoon of “Hell Runners” were travelling through their area. (Hell Jumpers were volunteers from the military who were sent out on suicide missions to scavenge and patrol areas. They had no extra equipment and were badly trained.)

The hell jumpers, although badly trained and badly equipped, managed to turn the tide of battle. The infected were driven back and retreated. The problem was, Central Control ordered the “runners” to kill all the survivors, in case they were infected. Reluctantly, the runners obeyed the orders and killed them. All except one. A teenage boy had managed to sneak away from the runners and escaped to the suburbs.

 

It’s been two weeks since the infection came...

 

 

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Like I said, it's not the best...

[Pyrosocial]

our stories almost sound alike lol =P

[katashy]

It was yours that reminded me of this one!

 

Yours is very good by the way.

[Pyrosocial]

It was yours that reminded me of this one!

 

Yours is very good by the way.

 

heh thanks. i worte that like over a year and a half ago if not longer

yours is awsome too

[Herculine]

This looks like an excellent prologue to a novel.

[katashy]

Why thank you Herculine!

[Birrii]

Hey, it's great. :D

I can't understand why you didn't get an A for this one :(

Rreally adds the "fallout"-touch.

But what did your teacher say about it? (Just curious)

 

Better than the short stories that I wrote. :P

[katashy]

My teacher has a persona vendetta against me. I've forgotten an essay twice before and I forgot this one. :P

 

I try hard, but I ust fail and she doesn't like me. I think Im getting moved down a class actually, Im in the top now, but I wont be soon. :(

 

Gotta try.

[UncleRoe]

That's a badass little story you wrote.. sounds like you could make something out of it.

 

One of the mistakes i noticed was you spelled "recognized" wrong. One other mistake was reffering to the Hell Runners as Hell Jumpers,then back to Runners lol. Sides that the story rocked and you definitly deserve a high B for it.

[Maharg67]

As Herculine said, good description prologue to a story. Would be nice to see some diologue and more directly described action.

 

Fine idea. Good story.

 

What do the infected actually look like?