double standards

[kvnchrist]

I just got off the phone with my cousin, who lives down in Texas. She was telling me about a situation down there.

 

(1) It seems there is a promiscuous 14 year old girl down there that seemingly has a rather large reputation ding everyone but the kitchen sink. Well, anyway, This girl was dropped off at a house where a girlfriend of hers lived, but the only one that was there was an 18 year old high school kid, who is a straight A student and played Football. Anyway, the 18 year old came out of the shower to find this little girl nude and in his bed. Well, being young and stupid he followed through and somehow the authorities found out about it. As youy can guess 18+ and 17- don't mix and now the guy is looking at some serious time.

 

I know that this guy was stupid in going through with that, but I am curious how this little girl became so promiscuous.

There have always been flirts, but actual carnal Knowledge is not something that can be perfected alone.I found out later that the mother of this little girl tried to contact the boy and get them together, when the authorities told the guy, not to. He didn't repeat his mistake, but some mistakes can ruin you for life.

My question here is does anyone think that If it was an 18 year old girl and a 14 year old boy, would the girl be in any trouble, or would be boy be looked at as a stud and praised by others.

(2) Then there is the stories we've all heard over the last decade about teachers having sex with their students. To me, anyone looking romantically at any person past 5 years is someone that has issues. These people that go after kids are really out there and need to be left out there, with a hole in their head and in a hole in the ground. PERIOD!

 

Getting back to the teachers. My question is has anyone seen what I have, in that male teacher to female student is taken far more seriously than any instance of woman teacher to male student. I'm not condoning anything here or making excuses for these whack jobs. But I'd also like to talk about why our society seem to have stricter codes for men than on women. Should there be equality in everything, including these perverts. Is this a double standard and what does it say about our society.

 

Are women thought of as less responsible for their sexual actions then men and if so why is a man called a stud if he has three girlfriends and a woman called something more vile, if she has more than one boyfriend. This just doesn't make sence to me.

 

(Thank you for the word filter The word flirt doesn't bring out the connotations I wished., but this in turn gives my question more validity since It can't even be posted here)

[greywaste]

I just got off the phone with my cousin, who lives down in Texas. She was telling me about a situation down there.

 

(1) It seems there is a promiscuous 14 year old girl down there that seemingly has a rather large reputation ding everyone but the kitchen sink. Well, anyway, This girl was dropped off at a house where a girlfriend of hers lived, but the only one that was there was an 18 year old high school kid, who is a straight A student and played Football. Anyway, the 18 year old came out of the shower to find this little girl nude and in his bed. Well, being young and stupid he followed through and somehow the authorities found out about it. As youy can guess 18+ and 17- don't mix and now the guy is looking at some serious time.

 

I know that this guy was stupid in going through with that, but I am curious how this little girl became so promiscuous.

There have always been flirts, but actual carnal Knowledge is not something that can be perfected alone.I found out later that the mother of this little girl tried to contact the boy and get them together, when the authorities told the guy, not to. He didn't repeat his mistake, but some mistakes can ruin you for life.

My question here is does anyone think that If it was an 18 year old girl and a 14 year old boy, would the girl be in any trouble, or would be boy be looked at as a stud and praised by others.

(2) Then there is the stories we've all heard over the last decade about teachers having sex with their students. To me, anyone looking romantically at any person past 5 years is someone that has issues. These people that go after kids are really out there and need to be left out there, with a hole in their head and in a hole in the ground. PERIOD!

 

Getting back to the teachers. My question is has anyone seen what I have, in that male teacher to female student is taken far more seriously than any instance of woman teacher to male student. I'm not condoning anything here or making excuses for these whack jobs. But I'd also like to talk about why our society seem to have stricter codes for men than on women. Should there be equality in everything, including these perverts. Is this a double standard and what does it say about our society.

 

Are women thought of as less responsible for their sexual actions then men and if so why is a man called a stud if he has three girlfriends and a woman called something more vile, if she has more than one boyfriend. This just doesn't make sence to me.

 

(Thank you for the word filter The word flirt doesn't bring out the connotations I wished., but this in turn gives my question more validity since It can't even be posted here)

 

Well, I know somebody who has a parent that had intercourse at the first time at the age of 11 or 12, with a man who was over 20, she'd grown up in a horrible home and was left pretty much to her own devices and didn't even really have a childhood as such. Personally I'd quite happily off a guy like that.

 

I do my best to avoid double standards in real life but I think the difference occurs due to the fact that young boy can't get pregnant and that for the probable majority of females, sex is a far more emotional act than for males and so is a lot more complicated and potentially traumatic - also why I loathe the idiotic parallel that people try to draw between sex and violence in games and movies etc.

 

When it comes to people with multiple partners, first thing is, are they aware? Personally, it's a big thumbs down from me and it's a situation where I have the same opinion on regardless of gender anyway.

Edited July 7, 2011 by greywaste

[HeyYou]

Double Standard? You bet.

 

In the city where I live.... (population just north of 20 thousand....) there was a man that got arrested for having sex with an under age girl. He did not rape her, it was consensual. (ignoring the legal aspect of it all....) He got arrested, stuffed in jail, bond was set at 50,000 dollars..... not a week later... a 40 year old woman was arrested for providing alcohol to minors, and having sex with an underage boy in the back seat of her car, in their garage...... She was released on PR bond...... The man was sentenced to 15 years in prison. The woman got 90 days in jail...... (on the alcohol charge..... the sex charge seems to have been swept under the rug.)

 

What I find most curious about both situations is, had they been somewhere else, neither instance would have been a crime. Age of consent is all over the place just in the US.... (ranges from 13 to 18) And what I found funniest of all...... Vatican city, you know, the seat of the Holy Catholic Church? Age of consent there? 12. Seriously, WTF??

[Aurielius]

Double Standard? You bet.

 

In the city where I live.... (population just north of 20 thousand....) there was a man that got arrested for having sex with an under age girl. He did not rape her, it was consensual. (ignoring the legal aspect of it all....) He got arrested, stuffed in jail, bond was set at 50,000 dollars..... not a week later... a 40 year old woman was arrested for providing alcohol to minors, and having sex with an underage boy in the back seat of her car, in their garage...... She was released on PR bond...... The man was sentenced to 15 years in prison. The woman got 90 days in jail...... (on the alcohol charge..... the sex charge seems to have been swept under the rug.)

 

What I find most curious about both situations is, had they been somewhere else, neither instance would have been a crime. Age of consent is all over the place just in the US.... (ranges from 13 to 18) And what I found funniest of all...... Vatican city, you know, the seat of the Holy Catholic Church? Age of consent there? 12. Seriously, WTF??

It was instituted to the Middle Ages when the life expectancy was in the 40's and women were betrothed as early as six. just an historical reference not a comment pro or con.

[HeyYou]

Double Standard? You bet.

 

In the city where I live.... (population just north of 20 thousand....) there was a man that got arrested for having sex with an under age girl. He did not rape her, it was consensual. (ignoring the legal aspect of it all....) He got arrested, stuffed in jail, bond was set at 50,000 dollars..... not a week later... a 40 year old woman was arrested for providing alcohol to minors, and having sex with an underage boy in the back seat of her car, in their garage...... She was released on PR bond...... The man was sentenced to 15 years in prison. The woman got 90 days in jail...... (on the alcohol charge..... the sex charge seems to have been swept under the rug.)

 

What I find most curious about both situations is, had they been somewhere else, neither instance would have been a crime. Age of consent is all over the place just in the US.... (ranges from 13 to 18) And what I found funniest of all...... Vatican city, you know, the seat of the Holy Catholic Church? Age of consent there? 12. Seriously, WTF??

It was instituted to the Middle Ages when the life expectancy was in the 40's and women were betrothed as early as six. just an historical reference not a comment pro or con.

 

A bit off topic, but.....

 

One of the things I found funniest about the whole situation was, folks were screaming for blood about the guy, they were there on the gal as well, but, not quite so vociferous. And it was all about age. (the boy in question was two days away from his 16th birthday..... had the lady waited TWO days, it wouldn't have been a crime at all. Legally.....) So, what is it about some arbitrary line drawn in the sand, that suddenly makes it a heinous crime one day, and perfectly OK the next??? Why are girls in some places considered 'old enough' at a significantly lower age than even those girls in the county right next door? Who decides this? Why is it, in these cases, it is always the adult that is blamed? In the case of the lady, and the younger boy..... folks on the comments section for the article were squawking about how he was 'ruined for life' by this experience, and how he was 'depressed', and various other negative things...... However, when I had the chance to speak to some of his peers...... the story changes. Seems he was bragging about it at school to his buds, and that's how the story broke in the first place.

 

I think the most interesting part was, how folks put their own 'spin' on the situation, to paint the adults as the ones 'at fault' in both situations. Seems that underage kids would never, ever try and seduce someone older......

[kvnchrist]

I'm thinking a lot of these age levels is more to preserve the civility level of the adults more than caretaking for the younger generations. Only a few decades ago people were marrying and having kids at an age that some can't even drink legally today. After I left the military in 92 I stayed with my brother and overheard several conversations between his daughter and her friends and they knew more stuff at her age than I did right there. The idea that people are keeping these kids from certain knowledge by legislation is ludicrous. With so many places to discuss such stuff these people better start talking to these kids about how to carry themselves to gain the reputation they want to keep for themselves instead of deluding themselves into believing their kids are somehow innocent little angels.

 

 

As far as adults succumbing to some sort of weird desire for relationships with kids, I think these people have issues even before they intimacy is even brought into the mix. All you need to do is discuss a budget with some kids today to learn how onesided that would be. The issue of attraction between people of such age variations, I can't even fathom. I think these pedophiles are kids themselves, but on the inside. Just look at Michel Jackson and how whacked out he was, for a reference.

[DeadMansFist849]

Double standards are extremely unhelpful. I seriously hate the suggestion that men who don't want sex are "not real men", or that women who do want it are "unladylike" (and that is the least debasing term used.)

 

I honestly think all kinds of sexual assault, whatever the genders of the parties involved, ought to be treated as equally unacceptable. A woman who has sex with a minor, is as much of a horrible and creepy person as a man doing the same thing.

 

Also, it's damn annoying that it's somehow even more horrible if the incident was M/M and fetishized if it's F/F. Actually, it's all just as bloody awful if anybody sexually assaults another person.

[SilverDNA]

Double Standard? You bet.

 

In the city where I live.... (population just north of 20 thousand....) there was a man that got arrested for having sex with an under age girl. He did not rape her, it was consensual. (ignoring the legal aspect of it all....) He got arrested, stuffed in jail, bond was set at 50,000 dollars..... not a week later... a 40 year old woman was arrested for providing alcohol to minors, and having sex with an underage boy in the back seat of her car, in their garage...... She was released on PR bond...... The man was sentenced to 15 years in prison. The woman got 90 days in jail...... (on the alcohol charge..... the sex charge seems to have been swept under the rug.)

 

What I find most curious about both situations is, had they been somewhere else, neither instance would have been a crime. Age of consent is all over the place just in the US.... (ranges from 13 to 18) And what I found funniest of all...... Vatican city, you know, the seat of the Holy Catholic Church? Age of consent there? 12. Seriously, WTF??

That is an out right discrimination of the law that we are all equal before the law. Thus a double standard.

 

A similar thing that came up due to a studie from 2009. In a near to equal situation the studies revealed that female teachers tend to give boys one grade lower by nearly to equally same results than girls in tests.

 

Since here teachers are civil servants. Nobody asked what happens if a male makes an request at an governmental office where a female civil servant sits....

Hypothetically, if the studie is correct than the probably outcome might be that the male's request results in a failure, but if the men was married and would send his wive then would be probably approved. Would be a plausible out come here if the studie is true.

 

What now if there would be more similar double standards in a system that can be used this way and what would happen if those abuses would go on for more than three decades ? Would it be plausible that this could be proven sociological if it goes one for a long time or not ? What if there the damage can be scientifically measured and made visible with interdisciplinary sciences?

Edited July 7, 2011 by SilverDNA

[Deleted472477User]

One possible idea I have heard relates to keeping sexual control of females . When women aren't indulging in as many partners, it's easier for the men to know that any offspring produced are theirs. Just something I've heard,

[DeadMansFist849]

One possible idea I have heard relates to keeping sexual control of females . When women aren't indulging in as many partners, it's easier for the men to know that any offspring produced are theirs. Just something I've heard,

 

That is one hypothesis, yes. However, now that we have effective contraception, I think it's backward and unnecessary to shame someone for "impurity".

 

There's also the problem that this kind of bashing is not restricted to just having sex. People regularly bash women for dressing like a "prostitute", being friendly with men (not necessarily even flirting, just being platonic) or otherwise being perceived to act as a sexual being.