Soulmates

[SpellAndShield]

Me and my wife do no longer consider us as a merried cople only, we are also freinds, comrades, sparring partners, support, yes everything. All that will be difficult to achieve with changing partnerships.

I tend to agree old friend, my wife is also my best friend, my most formidable opponent, my sounding board, my ally and my lover, none of this occurred over night but evolved. Relationships require work and are the sum of all that both of you put into them.

 

DING DING DING!!! We have a WINNA! Give that man a Cigar!

 

Maybe DING DING DING for your generation but as I said no one wants to admit that generational trends affect this to a great extent.

[HeyYou]

Me and my wife do no longer consider us as a merried cople only, we are also freinds, comrades, sparring partners, support, yes everything. All that will be difficult to achieve with changing partnerships.

I tend to agree old friend, my wife is also my best friend, my most formidable opponent, my sounding board, my ally and my lover, none of this occurred over night but evolved. Relationships require work and are the sum of all that both of you put into them.

 

DING DING DING!!! We have a WINNA! Give that man a Cigar!

 

Maybe DING DING DING for your generation but as I said no one wants to admit that generational trends affect this to a great extent.

 

Just because folks won't admit it, doesn't make it any less true.

[Blacckkfire]

Be this a comedy video, it is still true.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gaid72fqzNE

[razorpony]

My wife and I found each other at a time when neither of us were looking for anything. I was in a bad relationship and she had lived through her fair share of them but when we clicked, it was like nothing else mattered. The world and everyone in it seemed to fade a bit leaving only her shining brightly. I don't know a way to explain it without sounding cheesy but things just started making sense... poetry, music, things I had heard before that never moved me shook me to my core because i finally understood what they were about. We've been together 8 years and have a wonderful daughter. I know everyone says relationships take work but this one honestly doesn't. It's as effortless as breathing. We've never had an argument in all that time either. Not to say we aren't opinionated about things, but if either of us sees that we hurt the other in some way then our own positions are immediately forgotten and we make up before the fight even begins.

 

So, does this make us soul mates?

 

We believe it does. I don't think there could be anyone else out there that could ever complete me the way she does. She's too perfect for me. Whatever happens this will be the last relationship for both of us because we are ruined forever for anyone else.

 

RP

[Dazaster]

My heart says yes but my brain claims different. It(my brain) claims to have evidence that love is merely a chemical reaction within itself and so the potential for "soulmates" is therefore unlimited. Stupid brain.

[myrmaad]

My heart says yes but my brain claims different. It(my brain) claims to have evidence that love is merely a chemical reaction within itself and so the potential for "soulmates" is therefore unlimited. Stupid brain.

 

I think my brain knows your brain. But my heart claims: Life is a chemical reaction, and yet so much more.

[brokenergy]

The concept of soulmates or the "one" is another concept which people make up which people feel warm about themselves. It's things like these which keeps people single because they hold a false imagery that they can find their match, when it's the complete opposite. It's a romanticized viewpoint, there is no such thing as the "one" or soulmates. If you feel that you found your soulmate or the "one", then go for it but don't assume that it is something permanent or everlasting. Relationships are not about pretty things, they take hard work and compromises on both sides to meet halfway and they are ever shifting.

[Nintii]

 

1) ... the concept of soulmates or the "one" is ... (a) ... concept which people make ... (to) ... feel warm about themselves.

 

2) ... things like these ... keeps people single because they hold a false image that they can find their match ... when it's the complete opposite.

 

3) ... It's a romanticized viewpoint, there is no such thing as the "one" or soulmates. If you feel that you found your soulmate or the "one", then go for it but don't assume that it is something permanent or everlasting.

 

4) Relationships are not about pretty things, they take hard work and compromises on both sides to meet halfway and they are ever shifting.

 

 

(sorry for deleting some of your words and adding my own (in brackets), but his is the way I read what you're saying ... and for the sake of clarity as I deal with each "point" you have raised)

 

Very good points brokenergy, I too have both asked and told myself these very same things as have many others.

 

1) True, but what's wrong with feeling special about yourself, with all the negativity going on all around us ... we as people need to have a dream, we need to have a hope in this hopeless world and what better hope than one where we take

center stage and our inner most fantasies become alive ... here we are special ... here we as in "I" am loved and wanted ... don't you have that dream to want to feel special too ?

Sometimes, that's all people have to hold on to.

 

2) If a person is single because they're waiting for Mr Right or Miss Perfect to come along, then they are going to wait a very long time, because those people don't exist ... everyone is flawed, every one has strengths and weaknesses ...

But at the same time we must have a basic set of standards before we get involved, there must be a set of "must have's" and "no no's", a few examples like cleanliness, no violence (from both sides), drug abuse etc.

Then we take it from there ... the way I see things is like this, you first get onto a bike and start peddling before it moves, so pass the yesses and no's and then take it from there.

The problem is this, we as women always tend to look at our partners as construction sites and want to build them up into our image of what we think is the perfect man ... yes, I agree that without us some of them will remain slobs and

untidy and rough and there is a bit of cleaning up to do ... sorry guys ... but then we need to stop and let "their" personalities shine through, and encourage them in their lives.

A woman who feels that she has to control the man in her life to keep him "perfect or ideal" has lost right there and then, because he will break free from her yoke sooner or later, I've seen it happen to others and have done it myself.

 

3 - 4) Yes, it is a romaticized viewpoint but it's also a reality, you can make it happen and you can "genuinely" meet the person that will fit all the criteria your heart wants, this "fit" is a soul-mate and it needs work ... like any garden you have

to prune the roses and pluck the weeds ... the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics, states that everything is breaking down, so mainenance is in order everywhere.

 

People hurt us, let us down, deceive, connive, and break our hearts, and so we begin building walls to protect ourselves, "no one will ever hurt me again" we say, the problem is that our walls become so high and our defenses so strong that

we, ourselves can no longer really touch others either.

 

Be careful not to become de-sensitized ... because our next relationship will bring the baggage of the previous and where that could have been our "soul-mate" we end up with a marred and barren thing, and so on and on.

my two cents worth.

[grannywils]

Nintii, go on with your bad self girl!! :dance: How did you get to be so wise??? :biggrin: :thumbsup: :)

[Nintii]

Nintii, go on with your bad self girl!! :dance: How did you get to be so wise??? :biggrin: :thumbsup: :)

 

*blush* I actually read the topic properly this time and didn't get all hormonal before the end of the second sentence ... *deeeeep crimson red* sorry ... me bad.