Taking Offense...

[Balagor]

>snip<

Not only did I refuse to take the calendar down, I then found another one through my horsey contacts depicting farriers wearing nothing but their aprons and put that up too. They were fine strapping lads too.

 

Needless to say, they knew better than to take me on after that. What's sauce for the gander is also sauce for the goose, my point being that men can get just as prissy as women.

 

Lol, I like that. No offense taken, :happy: but you reap what you sow :tongue:

[Lisnpuppy]

Women are different (And I prefer it that way) not deficient. And sometimes that difference does require 'special' consideration in a male orientated workplace. But sometimes that special consideration does go overboard.

 

When our local Volunteer Fire Department started allowing women, one of the new women complained about the pinup pictures in the men's lockers. These pics were not new, some had been in place for years. However, to avoid a lawsuit the men were ordered to remove ALL pictures, including family pics, because ONE person felt it was her duty to be offended by pics that she could only see by peeking into someone elses property. The other women said they were not offended and saw no problem. She quit after a few months claiming a culture of abuse existed at the department. :psyduck: The prohibition was continued even after a separate locker room was installed just for the women.

 

A few years ago, somewhere I worked, my team and I (five women among fifty men) got a bit peed off by the girlie calendars in the warehouse. I was old enough and bolshie enough when someone leered "I bet you wish you'd got a pair like that" to leer back "No I don't, mine are all my own thanks..." but some of the young girls felt a bit uncomfortable. Rather than moan, I decided to strike back and, at the time, the England Rugby Union team had produced a nude calendar (with strategically placed rugby balls for modesty I might add). So I stuck that up on the office wall. Lo and behold, the next morning the warehouse manager came in to see me.

 

"It's about that calendar, Jane..."

"Yeees, fine big lads aren't they?"

"The men don't like it, it's rude."

"Make them feel inferior, does it?" (It certainly should have done).

 

Not only did I refuse to take the calendar down, I then found another one through my horsey contacts depicting farriers wearing nothing but their aprons and put that up too. They were fine strapping lads too.

 

Needless to say, they knew better than to take me on after that. What's sauce for the gander is also sauce for the goose, my point being that men can get just as prissy as women.

 

 

Quid Pro Quo

or a less civilized way to say it

payback is a B--tch.

 

hah

[grannywils]

Women are different (And I prefer it that way) not deficient. And sometimes that difference does require 'special' consideration in a male orientated workplace. But sometimes that special consideration does go overboard.

 

When our local Volunteer Fire Department started allowing women, one of the new women complained about the pinup pictures in the men's lockers. These pics were not new, some had been in place for years. However, to avoid a lawsuit the men were ordered to remove ALL pictures, including family pics, because ONE person felt it was her duty to be offended by pics that she could only see by peeking into someone elses property. The other women said they were not offended and saw no problem. She quit after a few months claiming a culture of abuse existed at the department. :psyduck: The prohibition was continued even after a separate locker room was installed just for the women.

 

A few years ago, somewhere I worked, my team and I (five women among fifty men) got a bit peed off by the girlie calendars in the warehouse. I was old enough and bolshie enough when someone leered "I bet you wish you'd got a pair like that" to leer back "No I don't, mine are all my own thanks..." but some of the young girls felt a bit uncomfortable. Rather than moan, I decided to strike back and, at the time, the England Rugby Union team had produced a nude calendar (with strategically placed rugby balls for modesty I might add). So I stuck that up on the office wall. Lo and behold, the next morning the warehouse manager came in to see me.

 

"It's about that calendar, Jane..."

"Yeees, fine big lads aren't they?"

"The men don't like it, it's rude."

"Make them feel inferior, does it?" (It certainly should have done).

 

Not only did I refuse to take the calendar down, I then found another one through my horsey contacts depicting farriers wearing nothing but their aprons and put that up too. They were fine strapping lads too.

 

Needless to say, they knew better than to take me on after that. What's sauce for the gander is also sauce for the goose, my point being that men can get just as prissy as women.

 

Ginny, you have done it again!!! You are my hero(heroine) whatever. I just love this story....:thumbsup:

 

[hoofhearted4]

you have to be careful about everything now a days cause everything has the potential to be a hate crime. and because its so easy, many ppl will take that and run with it trying to get some money or sympathy or whatever. its stupid

 

you can say what you want to me, i have some pretty thick skin...and if you do manage to get under my skin, its not like im gunna go home and slit my wrists (crap did i just do a hate crime on emo kids?....crap i think emo is a stereotype....crap i think crap can offend people.)

 

 

just look at the whole Obama thing. anyone who doesnt support him is a racist. its pathetic.

[marharth]

just look at the whole Obama thing. anyone who doesnt support him is a racist. its pathetic.

What? I don't support Obama and I am a liberal. I am pretty sure a whole lot of other liberals also do not support Obama. Who exactly says that?

 

I do agree that a lot of things can be a hate crime and taking offense and using the law should be done in extreme cases only.

[Nintii]

... Women however, I still have difficulties to figure them out :confused: lol (though I´ve been with one for 36 years) :turned: . To me it seems like it is their social status that is touched when they get offended. I´m not so sure. Any hope I did´nt offend somebody (@myrmaad @Nintii) :tongue:

 

I have no problem with my social status, as I have nothing to prove to anyone, I like who and what I am ... I quite simply don't have the time or inclination to bother with those who are bothered with me ... I'm not looking for approval ...and make no excuse for it and don't need a "yes" or "no" to either approve or disapprove me ... I just carry on carrying on.

I lost my "social standing" the day when I brought a girl home to a family function and decided to smooch her in front of everyone, the tongues are still wagging to this day.

 

I believe in myself period !

 

In business I deal with 99.999999% men only, and it's a crying shame to see the women who enter this world and are mentally bludgeoned to death and run ... I've hardened myself and hung in there as an equally tough opponent and have much respect from others.

My father and brothers and friends view me as reliable and a person of integrity and that's enough for me ... I am utterly loyal to a fault

 

I love those who love me and ignore those who don't ... quite honestly, we all offend each other somewhwere, somehow and in some way , but it's the ability to bounce back that counts in life.

So no, I'm not too concerned about my reputation as I don't have one ... I try to live above that ... reputations are for those who are afraid of the eyes of others.

[myrmaad]

I think we're missing something here.

 

There's a difference between being annoying and being intentionally disrespectful.

 

That's the key to it right there.

 

Because when you care enough to communicate respectfully, a person who is doing something unintentionally annoying, if they care about your feelings or are at least respectful of them, then they will change their behavior.

 

This is what I meant about "writing people off".

 

You can choose to be disrespectful to me, but that buys you a ticket out of my life, (probably a trait that Dark0ne picked up on when he was considering potential staff members).

 

Trying to change someone who isn't interested in mutual respectful behavior is far too much drama for me.

 

In society, we have laws to ensure a minimum of respectful behavior, but social consequences are much more effective than laws, and unfortunately our western culture has grown so pathetically weak and rootless that we no longer have strong social mores/consequences for such behavior. People use violent language in public and around their own kids and no one seems to bat an eye. It's offensive because we don't even consider the damage we do to others on a regular basis. It's all about Me, and what I want, and what I can get, and to hell with you and everyone else as long as I've got Mine.

 

I have the right to be offended by that, but more importantly I have the right to think less of people who blunder through society like that, I have the right to teach my kids to feel sorry for people who act like that.

 

I personally don't think it's a triumph to beat disrespect with more disrespect.

[Balagor]

>snip<

 

Because when you care enough to communicate respectfully, a person who is doing something unintentionally annoying, if they care about your feelings or are at least respectful of them, then they will change their behavior.

 

>snip<

 

You are so right, but it can be damn difficult, when not face-to-face, like on the internet.

[marharth]

I think we're missing something here.

 

There's a difference between being annoying and being intentionally disrespectful.

I was about to say something similar.

 

If you are annoyed at someone when they are doing something that in not intentionally screwing with you, its most likely your own fault. If someone is purposely doing something to annoy you then it is their fault.

[myrmaad]

 

 

If you are annoyed at someone when they are doing something that in not intentionally screwing with you, its most likely your own fault. If someone is purposely doing something to annoy you then it is their fault.

 

:laugh: :no:

 

"it's most likely your fault"?

 

If my spouse constantly loses the cap to the toothpaste, that is annoying. It may be lovably in character if he is an absent minded professor type, but it's still an annoyance when the paste dries up and the kids don't want to brush their teeth.

 

Or how about the wife who won't fill out the check register, "cuz you know, math isn't her thing". That's an annoyance.

 

These are not your fault.

 

If these spouses care about you, they will modify their behavior out of respect for your concerns.