Tidus44 Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 Melka, "There is a trick to this. Trick is to not bleed to death". Always good advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
groupoffriends Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 "They say Ulfric Stormcloak murdered the High King... With his voice! Shouted him apart!" When I first heard a guard say this, I laughed. He got me at "With His Voice!", "Shouted Him Apart" made if funnier.I hadn't read anything about Skyrim when I first started playing, I had no idea what a shout was, so I took this quite literally. Needless to say, I was letdown when I found out how exaggerated that story was. -_- The things Sheogorath says, in Oblivion as well as Skyrim, are some of the funniest lines I've ever heard! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clipeus Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 (edited) Favorite quote in my signature :biggrin: ("Need me some Skooma... the imported stuff... just one last time..." ) Edited March 11, 2012 by Clipeus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robanybody2000 Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 Sheogorath: "Was it Molag? No, no... Little Tim, the toymaker's son? The ghost of King Lysandus? Or was it... Yes! Stanley, that talking grapefruit from Passwall" "Now you. You can call me Ann Marie. But only if you're partial to being flayed alive and having an angry immortal skip rope with your entrails. I'f not... Then call me Sheogorath, Daedric Prince of Madness. Charmed." "Ooh, ooh, what kind of message? A song? a summons? Wait, i know! A death threat written on the back of an Argonian concubine? Those are my favorite." Also the whole scene with Farengar and Odahviing (while he's captured) in Dragonsreach. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xlcr Posted March 16, 2012 Share Posted March 16, 2012 (edited) Banning, a Breton ranger selling war dogs at the Markarth Stables, when asked by the Dragonborn for advice about the city simply replied: "don't fall". just found this mod, looks promising, canadian humor eh?Humour of Skyrim Volume 2 by Andrew Clements et alhttp://skyrim.nexusmods.com/downloads/file.php?id=11967 Edited March 16, 2012 by xlcr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angryfather Posted March 22, 2012 Share Posted March 22, 2012 Urag gro-Shub "I don't care if you wrote it yourself. If you want a book you go by me." I totally rofled. lol "I'll beat you like a housecat" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kidhedera Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 Recently my girlfriends game bugged out, and she was unable to access Jenassa's inventory anymore. After fiddling around with the console for ages, I eventually decided killing Jenassa was the only way to get back all the stuff she was carrying. My girl has a slightly mad attachment to Jenassa so insisted that I kill her somewhere appropriate (we ended up deciding on the Kynareths Temple in Whiterun) and lay her body out all nice before looting it. Anyway, I kill her, lay out the body, take her stuff, and then I respawn Jenassa. She appears right next to her corpse, takes one look at it, looks at me, and says "Hey, I don't want any trouble, not after what you did to me last time!" I cracked up. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billyro Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 (edited) The part in the Dark Brotherhood when you have to poison the Emperor, and you have to put in the ingredients. 1st ingredient: carrots. 2nd ingredient: vampire dust.3rd ingredient: a giant's toe!4th ingredient: ... a septim. Some of the chef's responses are so funny to these. :) Edited March 23, 2012 by billyro Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScorpionHunter Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 You seen my father............ (why don't she ever shut the luck up) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
icestormganon Posted March 23, 2012 Share Posted March 23, 2012 "Ah, I so do love Riften, I visited it in my youth and a thief stole from me, he took my purse and I took his eyes. It was a fair exchange." Lucien Lachance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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