Defending a friend from a bully?

[Mktavish]

Yes the demeanor of the victim needs more consideration than the demeanor of the bully , to really gauge the situation.

Like do they always find themselves in a position of victim hood over various scenario's, and why is that ?

Maybe they find power in it from an early encounter in their life , where someone stood up for them against perceived bullying. And it just developed into a learned behavior.

 

On Trump , I think he does enjoy a certain level of being portrayed the victim. And finds power in it ... by all the people that then feel the need to defend him. Which imo , makes them the real victims. But what is the media suppose to do , ignore him ?

No I don't think we / they can afford to. But some thoughtfulness towards not being made a tool would be good. At least more so than it seems is being done.

 

@ the OP ... if this is a real concern of yours towards the friends you have. It would seem you yourself is a potential for being bullied. But it doesn't sound like that is a concern of yours.

So why is it that a friend is finding them self in a position of victim hood , for you to have such concerns about whether or not to insert yourself ?

How come they can't seem to enjoy your level of avoiding bullies ?

[Mudran]

Maybe that is the reason why bullying mostly apply to problem of children in school or physical attacks, because it is more obvious/transparent, while mature people are expected to defend themself, but sometimes defending yourself just makes things more confusing to others.

 

I'm not sure if OP will ever return to read this - so it is known that bully always target certain types of kids/people, that is why it feels like it will never end until that person will not change his pattern of behavior which makes him the target, so the question is if the suggestions here - to learn how to fight - aren't really the best. Police is useless usually and he will not always be there to help his friend anyway.

But him as a friend defending his friend is good enough if it will scare the bully out, because 2 of them is stronger than 1, he may lose interest - lonely /weaker people are usually target of a bully. But if it is more of them, or if he looks scared, I don't know.

[Mudran]

Or what if his friend would be a girl? My friend was attacked when someone thought that he is trying to impress a girl, they sort of won the fight. Sometimes you don't know whom you can meet on your way from a pub.

Some people are so sick in their heads...

 

The more I think about it the more I think if it is your friend, you shouldn't just watch him being beaten no matter of what- you can be the next target because you will look weak or you will stop value yourself or your friend will stop respecting you... So I think you should fight and be in that with your friend or call for help...

 

And another question - what if you defend yourself, but the bully/aggressor thinks he is too weak and call reinforcements? :tongue: He/she lies that he was attacked and then you have to fight with even cool but stupid or confused people :sad: Or you realize so many people around you actually wait for a moment when someone will be attacked, because they love it, so under a cool paint is very smelly rotten garbage :sad: So many people aren't worthy of anything.

Edited February 5, 2019 by Mudran