That Old Lonesome Road

[Flipout6]

Thanks, baldur. Might take a couple chapters to implement (I have chapter 7 completely done, now.) but I'll take that advice. Constructive criticism is ALWAYS welcome. From ANYONE.

[Flipout6]

*disregard post, internal server error.* Edited August 14, 2012 by Flipout6

[Flipout6]

*disregard post, internal server error.* Edited August 14, 2012 by Flipout6

[Flipout6]

*disregard post, internal server error.* Edited August 14, 2012 by Flipout6

[Flipout6]

*disregard post, internal server error.* Edited August 14, 2012 by Flipout6

[Flipout6]

Oh, this is gonna be a long post, but the dialogue is spaced out. You shouldn't die of cancer caused by giganticus wallust of textus.

 

“Five minutes. I need the lay of the land.” Jason stated. He looked around, and found a bar. A man stood there, slogging down a bottle of whiskey.

“Hey there, I'm Samuel Kerr. What can I get you?” The man asked.

 

“Information. And Scotch.” Jason replied. Samuel reached underneath the counter and came up with a full bottle of alcohol. Jason pulled out the cork and took a swig.

 

“What do you need to know?” Samuel asked.

 

“I need to know a lot of things, mostly about the Mojave Wasteland...” Jason said.

It was several minutes before Samuel finished telling Jason about the geography, wildlife, plants, and notable locations in the Mojave. Jason learned a lot, but most importantly, some new ingredients to use in the creation of food and medicine. He could make antivenom out of a severed radscorpion tail, but he didn't know that the eggs of a cazador were edible, or that White Horsenettle was slightly edible, but could be mixed into a variety of deadly poisons.

 

“Well, that's about all I can tell you.” Samuel finished.

 

“Thanks.” Jason said, and stood up from his stool. Veronica had never asked for a drink. Instead of getting himself or Veronica drunk (he was smart enough not to drink too much alcohol, for one.) He bought a good supply of food, after taking inventory of everything the two of them owned.

 

“Y'know, I don't think I got your name.” Veronica prompted, while they were getting ready to go.

 

“Jason Rivers.” Jason replied, in his usual brief manner.

 

“Where are we going next?” Veronica asked.

 

“Camp Forlorn Hope.” Jason replied shortly. They hit the road, going East, with Veronica leading, as she knew the area better than Jason. They didn't run into much along the way, just the odd gecko. Jason collected some of the meat for later. When they were about halfway there, Veronica started asking him questions. The “q” word.

 

“You don't talk much, do you?” She asked, amused.

 

“No.” He replied.

 

“What skill do YOU have?”

 

“Lots. Mostly combat-related, but some medical and wilderness experience and training.”

 

“Where did you get that kind of training?”

 

“Long story.”

 

“Could I hear that story?”

 

“When we know each other better.”

 

“Fair enough. How far east are you from, then?”

 

“Very far. Past Legion Territory.”

 

“Wow, you have come a long way, then. Any friends back home?”

 

Jason's face grew sad for a moment, but he wiped any sort of expression of it. “Some. Not many true friends.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Long story.” He said. He decided to turn the tables, in a rare moment. “My turn. What are your goals?”

 

“I want.... a dress.” Veronica replied. Thoughts filled her head of her in some of the most stylish dresses life can afford, and her face adopted a giddy expression for a minute.

 

“That's all?” he asked.

 

“Well, obviously I want to visit places in the Mojave, see how it is they do so well. But I definitely want a dress. Something that's cool and sexy, but also says 'Don't f*** with me.'”

 

Jason looked at her like she was nuts, although his face was laced with the usual cold, apathetic look he was so good at projecting. “Okay. What section of the Brotherhood are you a part of?”

 

“I'm a scribe. More specifically a 'Procurement Specialist'. Like I said, I'm basically grocery shopping.”

 

“Are you on good terms with your fellows?”

 

“If you count trying to keep me as far away from Hidden Valley as possible to keep my out of everyone's hair as good terms, then yes. I think they gave me this post because they don't know what to do with me.”

 

“I think we're approaching Forlorn Hope now.” Jason reported.

[Maharg67]

Very good, I like it. All I suggest is that you leave gaps between paragraphs because this makes your writings easier to read. Human brain works that way, I suppose.

[Flipout6]

Hey, every little bit helps. Thanks a lot for taking the time to post some feedback. I'll probably post another chapter soon. Again, thanks a lot! :biggrin:

[Flipout6]

When the three of them arrived at the camp, it looked a sorry sight. It was filthy, with empty soda bottles and garbage thrown everywhere. The command tent was set up to the far East, beside the Medical tent. A small river ran through the middle of the camp, so at least they didn't have to worry about water shipments. A building made of scrap metal sat near the western edge of the camp. Troopers in the traditional olive drab armor milled about, slow and weary, a defeated look about them. The sentries looked exhausted, making Jason appear almost cheerful in comparison. Veronica found herself wondering how this was possible. That man, who was perhaps three years younger than her, was a walking depressant. Veronica had barely ever heard him speak a full sentence, and most of those were to the dog.

 

“Hey, whats the dog's name, by the way?”

 

“Guardian. Not his first name, but it sticks.”

Veronica hadn't seen the man fight, yet, he had just let Guardian eat any geckos they came across, but she doubted that Jason needed a guardian. Even that .44 on his hip was enough to make any raider think twice, and the fact that it had been modified-twice- indicated to Veronica that he knew how to use it. Not to mention the rest of his weapons. He was a walking tank. She had spotted at least three separate combat knives on him, in addition to a Sawed-Off Shotgun in another holster opposite the .44. And if all the additional explosives weren't enough, he had an axe strapped to his backpack. She couldn't even guess how many concealed weapons he might hold. She unconsciously felt a little nervous around him. His cold, apathetic demeanor and mysterious past made her unsure of his intentions, or even his true emotions. She had learned through her experience dealing with all sorts of people in the wasteland that people like him were either vicious, evil murderers inside, or instead quite sensitive. Everyone became a stone-cold killer when they had to, but few killed unnecessarily, or in a raider-like fashion. Still, he hadn't done anything that made red flags flash in her head. Yet. An MP looked at Jason, who had since taken the lead.

 

“Welcome to Forlorn Hope. Just don't cause any trouble while you're here, okay?” The MP asked.

 

“Understood.” Jason replied. “You're all in a rough spot.”

 

“Yeah. Legion's taken Nelson, mined the field down there. Brass has all but forsaken us, and we're practically out of supplies.”

 

“Then you need help.” Jason stated. Veronica noted that he seemed to be good at asking questions by simply saying something.

 

“Major Polatli is in the command tent. You wanna help, go see him.” The MP directed wearily.

The three of them probably looked quite a sight, walking through the flap to the command tent. A mid-twenties girl in robes, a Cattle dog, and a mysterious, heavily-armed stranger in a duster. Despite this, people seemed to look hopeful. Perhaps they thought that this new party of three walking through the tent flap could help them out. They were correct. Polatli stood examining a map. He was a Hispanic man with a black mustache and neck-length black hair, combed back. He looked up.

 

“What brings you to the tenth circle of hell?” he asked.

 

“I'm here to help.” Jason said. Veronica was somewhat surprised, but then, why else would they come here?

 

“Fantastic! Now, you don't look like a citizen, and you're no trooper, but we'll take all the help we can get. If you're telling the truth, then we have several things that need done around here. Dr. Richards has his hands full over in the medical tent. Our supplies are running low, so if you could get a supply shipment through, or kill some of the Legion scum that are intercepting them, that would help a great deal. I won't ask you to re-take Nelson, however. Too many Legionairies are holed up there. If every man in this camp attacked that town, we would lose. If they attacked us, they would lose. It's sort of a stalemate here. If you could shift the balance in our favor, we'd be grateful.”

 

Veronica was apprehensive about Jason's willingness to aid the NCR. They were enemies with the Brotherhood, and a strong NCR meant a low chance for the Brotherhood's survival. But she went along. As long as he didn't work against the Brotherhood, she was fine with him.

 

“Got it. I'll be in the medical tent.” Jason told Polatli. He was about to put his medical training to work.

Edited August 16, 2012 by Flipout6

[MikeRyan]

Its looking good pal, keep it up!