Why's it so hard...

[Darnoc]

I don't make differences. Everyone is human, so why should I treat someone different? And also I was never on a date (I'm 18). I don't have the time and there are other things to do which are more important. Like writing my novel :D

 

Why should I put myself in such an emotional unstable situation like dating? I can't afford emotional instability. The mind must controll the body, because with my mind I change things. Selfcontrol is important for my mind to work efficently. I can not allow my emotions to control my mind, it must be my mind which controlls them.

 

"For the apprentice tries to set things in motion with the power of his body, but the master sets things in motion with the power of his mind." Y'Berion

 

While instincts and emotions can be useful, they must still be under control of the mind and not otherwise. You can train your instincts and emotion so that they follow the orders of the mind and that they serve the mind. With your instincts you can sometimes forsee what is going to happen. Anger can give you strength or willpower. There are a lot of other uses of emotions and instincts. But you must train them in order to use them.

[Dark0ne]

(Can I just suggest that you don't take pointers on relationships/talking to girls from the people who openly admit to not have entered any relationships before? Experience is power, as they say).

 

Maybe we could get Theta to impart her wisdom on this subject - although (1) she may not remember her teenage years, since they were so long ago ( :lol: ) and (2) things were probably very different "in her day"...

 

Think I ought to go and hide now :bye:

[Malchik]

You can never hide from Theta, Dark0ne.

 

My (experienced) tip - the more you 'try' the less you succeed. Let it happen. Just make sure you are in a place where it might. (i.e not alone in your room exercising your right hand - on the mouse playing Morrowind, I mean.)

[m_gobes]

I'm another of these 18 and never been on a date people, so you can listen or just ignore me. I don't have a "girlfriend" but some of my best friends are girls. I see this as being better than dating for a few reasons: I don't want to be screwed up from emotional rollercoasters (like I've seen a lot of my friends go through), I don't need that extra stress, anyone with a girlfriend seems to have no money (I already have this problem; no need to help it any more), most importantly I think that having a girl as "just a friend" is better because you can get to know them without them putting on some sort of mask that is better than what they are. I would rather see a true person than see something better than them, get married, then be disappointed. so here it is, another inexperienced single bachelors advice.

 

 

now to answer your question, when your talking to a girl get to know them well at least 6 months then it will be easier (I should write less difficult) it will still be difficult but the likeliness of staying good friends is higher if you know that person before you start dating.

[Dark0ne]

6 months? God, might as well wait until he's Theta's age before trying, huh? :bye:

[Darnoc]

Yes, money is a problem. I know from the other guys who do date, they have money-problems all the time. And I don't earn very much, I'll have to watch every bit of money I have. So I don't go out usually, because I know exactly how expensive all those drinks are. And when I drink, I really drink (this means, until I am drunk). For this I just don't have the money, so I usually don't do it. Only when there are free drinks :D

 

I never had problems talking to girls. You can talk reasonable with any person, be it a man, a woman, a boy or a girl. Of course not with everyone, there are some really dumb persons around. I hate small-talk for example, when I talk, then I talk seriously. I only speak when there is something really interesting to talk about, something important. Anything else is a waste of time and energy. I don't bother with whom I talk, as long as the other person is reasonable and intelligent enough to discuss something of real importance.

 

Interesting tough that sometimes the people to whom other people would never talk to have the most interesting things to say, like foreigners, punks, "stupid" people (handicapped). The normal people are mostly the dumb, boring ones who always talk about boring things (small talk). I know people who would be considered as a little "left behind" (low IQ) but with whom you can have the most interesting talks. They may seem a little stupid for those who do not look closesly, but in reality sometimes these people we think are stupid are the more intelligent and wise.

[Dark0ne]

Money? Can't say I ever run out, I'm just not weak-minded and foolish enough to be exploited in such a manner. I never needed money to have fun, there's more to going to the cinema, going out for meals, taking her to see the opera (cough) et cetera. Last time I checked, long walks along the beach, talking along the harbourside and going over to friends were all free.

[m_gobes]

I know this I'm just saying most guys will end up spending money on their girlfriend to buy gifts or take them places (something I can't afford much of) I do go places with my friends occasionally and less often I buy something for them but yes I agree with you Dark0ne walks on the beach and other things are free and usually more meaningful than watching a movie together with someone because you can be free with them you can be yourself.

[Darnoc]

I wouldn't go on the beach tough, I would rather go into the mountains or the forrest for a week or so, just walk the earth, with no concerns than myself (and whoever comes with me) and then I (and whoever is with me) can do what I (and the other person/s with me) want. If I ever find a woman who would do this together with me, also likes writing, philosophy, fantasy, sciencefiction, serious talking and dislikes smalltalk, the injustice in this world, destruction of nature, Bush and similar people and normality, then I would consider spend my time with her or even my life. Until such a person appears, I have better things to do.

[Dark0ne]

If I ever find a woman who would do this together with me, also likes writing, philosophy, fantasy, sciencefiction, serious talking and dislikes smalltalk, the injustice in this world, destruction of nature, Bush and similar people and normality, then I would consider spend my time with her or even my life. Until such a person appears, I have better things to do.

 

Unfortunately these people don't know where you are ... so there's an obvious problem ;)