Jump to content

A never ending story


Gabbemaster

Recommended Posts

...But unfortunately, Sock-Wader appeared before the socks eyes, he had arrived from a galaxy, far far away. Sock-Wader used his Tight-Saber and cut of Giblets legs, put the legs in a bag, and dissapeard in a cloud of... dust...

 

Eh... said one of the socks...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 778
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Legless the Elf burped loudly and said: "We cannot have two leglesses - esses - esses." From his elven bag he pulls out the staff of "Grand Alf the Slightly-Off-White-I-told-you-not-to-wash-it-with-colours" and magics Giblet a new pair of legs. Unfortunately in his less than coherent state the spell is not quite right. Giblet gets the legs of Concert Grand Piano.

 

Fortunately the Viggorous 'Slider' son of Morten, aka Anacorn, aka Elvis (come on, weren't you expecting the return of the King?) knows exactly what has to be done.

 

"You must go to my beloved lady Owen." (Well, even elves get confused.) "She knows exactly what to do if you get wood!"

 

And so he waves his hand over Giblet who is suddenly....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

... overcome by the desire to burst into Elvish song.

 

However, his rendition of 'Jailhouse Sock' was not very well received by the assembled fellowship of the stocking, who thought his delivery rather wooden, and who did Giblet think he was anyway, gyrating away while implying that sock-kind had a leather fetish and actually enjoyed being confined within shoe-prisons and boot-camps.

 

The general opinion was that he did not have a leg to stand on.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Unfortunately, an argument sprang up almost immediately as to which Dungeon of Dragons they should seek out first, since several had been marked very clearly on an old treasure map from Adventures 'R' Us. Indeed, in the extreme north, south, west and east, plus in the middle of the ocean the map indicated that 'here be dragons'...

 

The socks weren't sure whether it would be best to explore one dungeon at a time, or whether they should split up.

 

They turned to legless Orlando for advice, since he seemed to be a very sensible chap, all things considered, and he definitely had the best hairstyle among those assembled - clearly an adventurer whose judgement one could trust.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Orlando bloomed under this lavish praise and pulled himself up to his full height. (He was too drunk to actually stand up).

 

"Friends, Romans, Countrysocks, send me your beers!"

 

An expansive welcoming gesture nearly tips him up again but he hangs on to a pillar of society.

 

"Go west, young sock!" He then launches into an Elvish rendition of 'Wooden Leg' obviously aimed at Giblet.

 

The wool socks are offended by the line 'treat me fine, treat me good' and start squabbling with the silk stockings.

 

One intrepid band of socks determines to follow the advice of Orlando and head into the Western Dungeon where they find...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

..not quite what they had expected. Instead of dragons or dungeons, the socks came upon a huge dwarven scrapheap emporium.

 

 

''Welcome tae DisnaeWork, pal," the dwarf sitting by the gate greeted the foremost sock. "Yous lookin' tae get stuff fixed, or yous just havin a wee look aboot?"

 

The socks were confused by the mountains of malfunctioning household appliances, broken weaponry, empty potion bottles and other such items presided over by a giant wooden mouse - which Grouchy the dwarf assured them had only had one previous owner and would only need a few cosmetic repairs to be a fully functional surprise siege engine once again - and didn't know what to say, until one of them remembered to mention Giblet's predicament.

 

Grouchy looked very surprised to hear the name....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Britney! Britney Halberds!

 

But suddenly there was an influx of new socks. First there was a group from the US. Red Socks from Boston, Blue Socks from Minneapolis and a group of White Socks arguing over whether they were from Boston or Chicago.

 

Next came a contingent of long lost forum socks - one had made a peregrination all the way from North Carolina. One had clearly belonged to Dark0ne because it had dark 'sockiopathic' tendencies. As to the one from Sockihall street....

 

OOC> Missing any socks Theta?

 

One had switched owners in Sussex UK. There was a Sockdologer from North London and a sockialite from the west of England who wanted all to love him for who he was.

 

And still more arrived, including...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

... a very disreputable sock which had been stuffed down the back of the server by Dark0ne's very own smelly sock slave, and had singledfootedly been responsible for famine, drought, plague, war and forum downtime.

 

The reason for the devastation wrought by this innocent looking piece of footwear - it was so dirty that the pattern on it was difficult to make out, but seemed to feature a character wearing glasses and holding a pointy stick - became obvious as soon as the sock was within olfactory perception range.

 

Grouchy the dwarf turned a whiter shade of pale, and sent for his siblings Harpy, Zippy and Chuck for backup before proceeding to throw up.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...