Fallout 3, the race for Eden

[Maharg67]

Very excellent! :thumbsup:

 

Will surely read again. :yes:

 

Looking forward to more being written. :thumbsup:

[Keanumoreira]

Thanks Maharg67. Its getting more difficult to come up with good material, but I knew this was coming. But I can do it, I've been faced with this problem before.

[Corlan]

Pure Awesome man, It's really Legendary, thanks for sharing.

[Fifoo]

Chapter 3: An unexpected detour

<snip>

“That was humiliating.” I responded away from the store owner.

 

“I can tell she’s going to be a riot.” He responded back.

<snip>

Hilarious! The hassle's begining for the hero...

 

Your story is really good. Keep it up, I'm going to be an addict of it for sure :thumbsup:

[Keanumoreira]

Glad you like it Fifoo, mores coming up soon.

[species5478]

Very good writing. :thumbsup: Your talent for character design should be noted. It's probably the hardest thing to write. Other elements such as environments, or general plot details, tend to be easier for most people but it seems you have a natural talent for the hardest aspects of literature. Keep it up.

[Fifoo]

Agreed with you species5478. Some others stories I've seen are great ones indeed but sometimes they are too much descriptive and technicaly wroten and so tend to be a little annoying for a novice or non English native reader like me.

 

[iMHO] To be clear, comprehensive and pleasant, those criterias make the story being most immersive and there is also something fresh I found here : some good frame of mind. :happy:

[Keanumoreira]

(Sorry guys, its a little short. I've been overwelmed with school latly.)

 

Smoke flooded the aircraft as pieces of its torn exterior rained down on the parched landscape. The ground grew nearer, the Virti faster, the screams of sheer terror roared all around. Just before impact, the pilot jumped from his seat and threw himself to the floor, hoping to survive the crash. He should have stayed put. The Virti smacked head on into the desert that was Nebraska, flipping and tumbling before coming to a crude halt followed by an invasion of sand. The back seat gave way onto me, pinning me to the ground. Dust particles sprinkled around me, resting on my head.

 

When everything settled, the only sound to be heard was that of our attackers, landing near the site. Their transportation was much more sophisticated than ours, bigger, sturdier, better armored, and better equipped. The back of it opened up, and landed on the dirt, revealing a ramp for accepting vehicles.

 

Men spilled out, boxing the Verti in with their numerous selves. Everyone one of them aimed at their target, but they didn’t shot us. Instead, the commander of the group emerged from his flying fortress, and surveyed the tattered junk ahead of him. His green, and well managed outfit mounted him high above his mini army, badges of various kinds shimmered in the sun. He stood very still, not moving, not turning, not making the slightest sound. He was searching for survivors, listening for the smallest slipup, that one crack in time when his enemies exposed their hiding place.

 

From beneath the seat, dust packed the inside of my nose, the stimulant to sneeze had been activated. I tried with every muscle to hold back the buildup of pressure, but couldn’t resist the seducing bliss to sneeze. The rush of mucus indulged air was just what the general was waiting for. He followed his second sense, drawing out the life form he had stitched over his pleasure center. Each step was delicate, professional, intimidating, as his presence continued to erase the gap between us. When he had reached his intended location, he grinned as he saw my helpless body trapped under the very object that I entrusted with my life.

 

“Well, well, well.” The general said.

 

“What do we have here? A survivor? ”

 

He crouched down so that our eyes were leveled.

 

“My boy look at you, so pale, so frightened, so tense. Don’t worry we’re not here to kill you, we just want to, well, let’s just say that when we’re through with you, you won’t recognize your past self. Men, pull him from the carnage, tell the scientists to get their toys out, we’re having a play date!”

 

His minions heeded their master’s words as they plucked me from my prison, soon finding myself being imprudently dragged, becoming a tormented ragdoll as I was tossed about. They carelessly through me into a holding cell, sealing me into total darkness other than a lone window with small traces of light, making its way inside.

 

My horrible mistreatment surprisingly hadn’t broken my body, neither did the plummet from the sky, I was, however, brusied and sore with cuts caressing my legs and by now, my aching back. But despite my mildly mauled body, I was strong enough to watch as a pulse grenade was thrown into the wounded Virti. The electric blast was too much for the old girls circuitry, and computer systems, and destroyed her, along with anything left alive inside, in a blink of an eye. The explosion felt as if it mirrored in my eyes, I wasn’t so much in grief that the men died, but how cruel the action was carried out.

 

Pure rage, filtered scorn, purified intolerance that had at last began to surface, bubbled within the deepest sectors of my gut, ready to spill over like boiling water in a pot left unmanaged. All I wanted to do was strangle the man responsible for such unspeakable, such unreasonable, acts and complete disregard for others safety, all I wanted was for him to pay, and listen as his neck snaps like a worthless twig. I had witnessed as my entire home was savagely torn before me, as my fellow vault mates, even if I didn’t love them, were brutally eliminated for no good reason. Then I’m forced to hike twenty five miles to D.C., and retrieve a f****** G.E.C.K, a machine so small that it could fit in an overcoat, from California all the way on the other side of this bloated rock. And now I get shot down by a group of random, psycho maniacs who want their way with me? It’s as if someone put us in a virtual box, flipped the switch on, rewrote all the rules, repainted the world into a nuclear apocalypse, and then let everything play itself out in its own sick and twisted way. I wish it was like that because it would have made more sense then what was currently transpiring. What these men wanted with me I didn’t know, and I as sure as hell didn’t want to know. All I wanted at that point was to use this machine, rebuild the world, and then peacefully await death on my own terms, in my own way, as this universe of random destruction slowly unravels itself, but no, we have to play it the hard way.

 

And so I sat there, furious, as I was kidnapped from the mission and taken to an unknown location, miles from civilization, if civil even fits here, and taken against my will. Hours later, or at least it felt like it, we began to descend on a giant series of buildings stretching over the dunes, and I was definitely not the only one. Dozens of other floating prisons, raced across the evening sky towards the same location, dozens more were just leaving and began to skim their “territory”.

 

As the altitude dropped, so did the temperature. The speed at which we were going gathered hordes of bone chilling air and hosed it on my already broken spirit. Turbulence only made it worse as the aircraft rocked violently back and forth, throwing me against the walls like someone had shaken the room up.

 

When we finally returned to a cruising flight, we steadily began to land inside one of the buildings in this complex. Whatever it was classified under, I didn’t like it. I gripped my two hands around the steel bars blocking me from freedom, their icy touch hugging my palms, draining my energy. I observed our location, it was an experimenting area, as the sign on one of the doors clearing read. We came to a sudden stop as we landed on the preferred landing sight. I relinquished my holding on the bars as my cell door flung open. One of the soldiers, his face concealed with a frightful helmet, stepped in.

 

“Come.” He ordered blankly.

 

I cautiously walked up to him, flinching as he seized my arm, and positioned me in front of him, a gun placed upon my back.

 

“Walk.”

 

I did as he ordered and headed for the exit. Just before arriving outside, he kicked me from the aircraft, waiting for the doors to close as they departed. As they broke away from the facility, a gathering of unknown people, wearing what appeared to be orange, radioactive protective suits, snatched me before I could even turn around, and strapped me to a gurney of some sort. They then silently began to roll me inside their working quarters, excited to see what they could tinker with today.

[Keanumoreira]

You can count on my vote Fifoo, I try to make my stories well written, with sophisticated words, but in a manner where it can be both understood and appealing to the eye. At the same time I try not to put BIG words in because I know from experience that it will confuse my readers. Read on guys, just give some time, I'm adding a little bit to the next section day by day.

[Fifoo]

Great story, it's worth the trip - (Lol) - :wink:

 

It's easy to identify with the hero, and it's not the minor wishes I could make here. Take your time for the next, we are not in hurry. I personally think that releasing a complete chapter in one time would be better for the reading.