The Snow Arena

[Malchik]

Witnessing the amazing side effects of Abu's flu jab in the mind of the poor dumb beast, the nice vet gives the little kitty a bowl of milk and starts to monitor its brain waves.

 

Wouldn't it be interesting if the cat actually thought like a human.

 

Meanwhile Malchik clone 765876543.7765, having recovered from his hangover, decides to get drunk on schnapps. Since he exists in a parallel universe that shifts whenever attacked he gets dizzy enough not to worry about the effect of alcohol (or dark matter come to that.)

 

He sends to SkoomaCat via UPS (utterly paralytic services) a seasonal greeting card and a one use only scroll of aileurodeath.

[cryocry]

(Not Snow Arena related)-

 

Dark Matter Cells, when shot, mutilate whomever they pass through, except Gladiators, Giant Spides, the Makron, etc. Why don't you play Quake 4, Abramul?

 

(Snow Arena time! Oh, and Abu's a big cat)-

 

Abu wakes up from his dillusion. He exits the cat body he formed in a machine, and takes over a Khajiit's body on Nirn. He recalls his Legions there, and installs his army there. He also unites all the races of Nirn as one, and sets up his stronghold. The trains the Imperial Legion (now the Khatine Legion) the ways of his army, and sets up base.

 

Back at the vet in America (I'll just say that) on Earth, now re-named Abultia-

 

The cat body falls into it's skin-like rest, laying flat on the blanket. The vet realizes that he messed with the almighty Abu, and kills himself.

 

On Nirn, renamed Abir-

 

The Khatine marines shoot a life-destroying blast at Stroggos. All the Stroggs are vaporized, and the USMC, thankful for Abu's service, joins the KMC. Abu sets up some scout bases on Nasser and Segunda.

 

Before Abu left the fake cat body-

 

His butt unleashed it's wrath after Abu drank the milk, because cats are allergic to milk. All the diarea lands on the vet's assistant.

[Povuholo]

olohuvoP is angry because not only he got owned big time, people also spelled his name wrong! olohuvoP takes out his chicken gun and shoots. A few chickens get stuck in the rail gun and it explodes.

 

Okay enough fun. olohuvoP starts building a snowman he calls ehT drihT muidimuN, also known as nahkalukA owT. Anyone got a heart?

[taggart19]

Moloch cant move his legs so he crawls into a hole in the ground to rest.

[cryocry]

Abu teleports one of his many Rail Guns into his hand. But, seeing as he doesn't need one, sends all of his arsenal back to his command ship. He casts Melt Snow (it doesn't do fire damage), and beats up olohuvoP. He teleports all of olohuvoP's weapons, inlcuding the Chicken Gun. Also, he fills his armory with every shigle weapon invented, in history and in future (also everything that can be used as a weapon), from every planet, astroid, etc. He also hires the Nerevarine to destroy the huge snow man. He teleports a FA-105V to the ground next to him. He takes off in it, and starts vaporizing everyone with the Dark Matter Machine Gun included on that model of fighter.

 

But I'm telling you, olohuvop, those must have been some pretty small chickens, seeing as the barrel is small on a Rail Gun...

[taggart19]

Moloch calls apon his God and asks for the power to fight. In return he gives him a new strength. The power to DUPLICATE!!!!!! he summons 1 million copys of himself to attack Abu in hope of destroying him once and for all. >:(

[Abramul]

I would think that if a chicken is traveling at sufficiently high velocity, and isn't frozen, it could kinda squish into a gun barrel.

[Malchik]

Abu has been so worried why his attempts to become master of the universe have failed, he has not noticed that one side effect of his plans had been to (temporarily) turn him into a dog. It will wear off in twenty four hours.

 

In the meantime he has an overwhelming need to find a lamp post.

 

This is awkward as he has destroyed most places with lampposts. Perhaps there is one on Sirius. After all it is the dog star.

[cryocry]

Abu isn't destroyed. He commands his army on Abir to fire on the army of Moloches. All are destroyed. He casts a spell that summoned a Khatine platoon to his position. He orders them to attack anyone who attacks him. He upgrades their weapons so that if someone attacks him, the Khatine Machine Guns send a signal to the Khatine using the gun to fire at the person attacking/doing something un-beneficial to Abu.

 

At Abu's Cat Lab-

 

The Khat (Abu's minions, can be talking about any type) Scientists develope paper airplane bombs. Abu stocks up on some and tests them. They work perfectly. No one can stop Abu! Ever! Meow, Meow, Hiss!

 

After the above-

 

 

Oh no! He has to watch a cheesy Power Ranger battle on Sirius! Nnnnnooooooooooo! Abu drinks a Dispel potion (yum, tuna!) at blows up Sirius from his personal battle ship.

 

On Sirius-

 

"Kieye!" says the Red Ranger. "Ahhh!"

 

"You Power Rangers are weak!" says the stupid non-monster-like monster.

 

"Meow?" meows Abu. This is where he drinks his Dispel potion.

 

 

 

 

After Abu blew up Sirius-

 

"Hmmm..." says Abu, "I wonder if The Vulture will let me whizz in Canada...".

[Peregrine]

BCG-601 Gunboat Diplomat, 6th Fleet Flagship

 

 

"Signal from Shadowdancer, we've found them!"

 

 

Admiral Aleksi sar-Ryskin, newly-promoted commanding officer of the Hellbird's Legion forces in the Arena sector, looked up at the comm officer's report. Already, scan data from the cloaked recon ship was beginning to appear on the map display filling the center of the battlecruiser's bridge. Transports with battleship escort, he observed with some confusion. Sending the drop ships in the first wave was a near-suicidal tactic, but then again, Abu was hardly an experienced commander. But still, the sheer number of opponents demanded some caution...

 

A few key taps brought up the squadron's entry vector, aligned for a long-range bombardment of the invasion force. "Group One, stand by to jump on my mark," he replied. With those simple words, the counter-invasion was begun.