Marcus Wolfe Posted April 22, 2008 Share Posted April 22, 2008 Marcus collapsed to his knees, exhausted from trying to escape the afterlife. It was at this moment, that he noticed the long pole next to him. He cried out to a nearby computer technician, “Save me a spot in the line to geek heaven, I’m not done just yet!” In a sudden burst of ingenuity, he used the pole to vault over the treadmill and escape the afterlife! He ran for quite a while, until he reached the river Styx. Styx: the river that would cause who ever drunk it’s water to loose all their memory. He asked Charon, the boatman, to give him a ride home, but the man with the fiery skull only shook his head. Disappointed, Marcus suddenly noticed a shackle on his wrist. But the chain did not lead back to the afterlife; in fact, it seemed to come from the world of the living. Charon explained: “That’s a necromancer’s chain, it’ll drag you through the river back to the world of the living. Of course, you’ll probably drink some of the river and loose your memories. That one’s not very strong, it won’t pull you unless you pull first.” Thinking for a moment, Marcus dabbed his feet in the water. Several mermen (the type with the fish tops and the human bottoms) appeared. “Excuse me, gentlefishmen, but would you mind finding 2 long pieces of wood and strapping them to my feet?” he asked them. The confused mermen did as they were asked, and Marcus pulled swift and hard on the chain. The chain responded, and soon Marcus was water skiing down the river Styx. And then he awoke in his old body. Several necromancers stood around him. The leader stepped forward. “Behold! Our first undead servant! We shall create an army….” Marcus stood up and grabbed the necromancer by the throat. “Thanks for the rez, pal, but I’m nobody’s servant.” He tightened his grip and the necromancer was choked to death. Marcus left the rest alone. He walked out of the cave, into the sunlight. “Now, the Spam Queen shall fall!” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jojo man Posted April 22, 2008 Share Posted April 22, 2008 Little did Marcus realize that Jojo_man was near the sight of his emergence into the sunlight. After just finishing doomjockeys banana split(that he had so skillfuly apprehended(sp?), he decided to continue after his one-time enemy. Scooping up a healthy sized snowball from the ground (and employing an absurd venacular for an unknown reason) he cries "Have at thee, foul, furry, foe!!!" as he throws the snowball. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcus Wolfe Posted April 23, 2008 Share Posted April 23, 2008 But the Canuck was too fast: He grabbed the snowball mid air and threw it back at jojo, knocking out all his teeth. He then proceeded to beat the tar out of jojo. He took off jojo's jacket and threw it to stephanie, because as much as Marcus likes girls with nothing but their skirts on, he knew the poor girl would freeze to death if she didn't put a top on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisnpuppy Posted April 23, 2008 Share Posted April 23, 2008 The Goddess looked around, bemused by her lusterous Spam-smelling hair. But her anger was not abated. She felt an eddy in the space-time pool...or a Marcus in the pool. She rose into the air, hair flying spreading the heat of an infinity of Span -filled fry pans into the world. Light and heat went everywhere..warming those without clothes in the Goddess's gentle love... and showing the holes in which furry little beaties hid..cowardly... The Goddess smiled with half her face, licked her hair and prepared for battle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doomjockey Posted April 23, 2008 Share Posted April 23, 2008 Battle ready as she was, the glowing goddess appeared the perfect target to Doom -aka POKE-MAN- who sped across desolate tundra, a rough ball of snowy goodness in one hand, a jar of honey in the other. REaching her position he pulled back and launched the ball mush at the Goddess-thief and... *sniff sniff* ...obvious Spam Ecclesiastic as he gobbled down a satisfying blob of sweet, sweet honey. Three cheers for cold and sour revenge! ...Cold and sour? It tasted like dirt flavoured ice crea- Ice?! :blink: Oh no! Doom looked down to discover a fistful of snow and an empty hand. "My honey!" he cried as it sailed unerringly toward the unwitting Goddess-thief. Doom braced himself for retribution, ignoring the protest of his bee-jacket for soon he would have to tell them what became of their treasured honey! The horror!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisnpuppy Posted April 23, 2008 Share Posted April 23, 2008 Without looking the Goddess reached up her hand, and snapped the honey jar out of the air like an overly-paid Golden Glove winner. <sniff sniff> Sweet nector filled her nose, only enticing her Spam-filled senses. Her joyous laughter filled Doom's heart with...horror? Glee? Confusion? "Decisions, decisions..." the Goddess pondered..."Peanut Butter and Honey sandwich, Honey-Baked Spam or a honey snowcone?" Fortunately for the Goddess she could multi-task like only a Goddess could.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IndorilTheGreat Posted April 23, 2008 Share Posted April 23, 2008 gman021 cautiously walks up to the Goddess, smelling a delicious aroma. He sees the food, and decides that he wants some. He just hopes that the Goddess has forgiven him... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisnpuppy Posted April 23, 2008 Share Posted April 23, 2008 The Goddess feels a presence... She looks down to see Gman021 looking pitiful and hopeful all at once. Cute as it was, he could not be so easily forgiven... "I don't see any boot licking..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IndorilTheGreat Posted April 23, 2008 Share Posted April 23, 2008 "But... but," he says. "I'm sick! I just want some food!" OOC: I really am sick. That's why I've been on so much this week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisnpuppy Posted April 23, 2008 Share Posted April 23, 2008 (I am sick also! Flu or something my little germ-carrier daughter brought home) The Goddess glared at him. "You threw Spam and slushballs at me...YOU got my hair WET!" She hissed...."DO you have ANY idea how long this takes to dry?" "Never let it be said I am not generous and forgiving. However if I feed you I will expect a favor of my asking in return.." The Goddess smiles a little smile.... "What will it be Child? Honey Baked Spam, Honey and Peanut Butter or a honey snow cone?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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