Dragonspyre Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 ATAKA AYE Ghilalash stood before the open womb of Zoar, so beBut little of ruination and devastation to be begat of ItIn the Time to come. Ghilalash saw spake void chars Usurped from Man shall be the joy, for naught saw hereIt be Daemon who lappeth the Water of Life from us. O,Failed be our aegis of rock and caked earth, service not Ghilalash felt the coiled airs clout his throat, night robOur voice and his, as he choked on the miasma rainsFrom the Beast unholy sacrilege who had rot the land Ghilalash Alone, begat of wishes and wounds in war, goTo take final his arms, to go away from the desolate eraAnd O, Ghilalash, go to be nothing. Ghilalash, go to die! Ghilalash, Ghilalash! Hath he climbed the crag not, heWould not see! He was alone in the shadow, no thingsCan be lost in men who persevere in hopeless storms! So, spear and sword laced upon his greaves, and bronzeFortitude upon the tacked and leathered flesh, binding soBy shackled chains, empty rattle echoes to be but cruel! Uponst this Crag of Zion, peak on shattered world, sayGhilalash his roar, against the violent and vile beast beCalled by men Utima, and by daemons Bii'shavath, O! Belt forth: "O, Daemon who bast and rapeth the skies soAnd he who defiles the Lands! So fear thee, I not, I roar aChallenge, that if I not die, the Earth barely after survive!" "Bii'shavath, Thy hand is cold and ruthless, and thy axeA daemonic razor, but in me lies will and life. For so I'veNot even a reason to live, All is taken, so I die in glory!" "Bii'shavath, Biishavath, I fear no death! If I am taken, I amBut with my fathers and their fathers in the beyond. But soKnow that as long as I live, Hell's vileness so take me not!" Acrost this gorge of the Valley, cannon roar reached HimAnd Bii'shavath Belted in voracious fury his boast, sent aSky in rot before, but nigh eviscerating the walls of Earth He said, "Who be thee? That thee say to being higher aPower and size that thy fate is not in certainty? I so didTo Terra the violence of Me, I razed all of men but thee!" "I come in vicious power, nothing stands before me! OI relict the sand of their waters, and draweth field grayAnd I've paled all powers, thee want end mine hours?" "I am the tempest of the Dragon, I come to vanquish OAnd thou art so vain and vile, that thee, the one of luckNow try to finish my life, but I shall send thee to knife!" Bii'shavath screamed and siren fell to claw at heaven aMessage of defiance and death, "O, thee, Ghilalash soShall die! I am Utima, and by my hand all life shall die!" AKATA AYE, UITIL CHAXL AKATA DOYUE How man could defy a beast like told be unthinkable!For, O thee, Reader, thou art not the eye of GhilalashAnd so must I tell you the horrible daemon Utima be! Stand he a massive demon, his haunches million ton beEach, and he stand like the Centauri, a league in lengthAnd half one in height. He stood vicious and proud well! Strappeth upon his body a mountain, rocks and stone!They be this, a breastplate, and his armlets made of aThousand boulders as if gems, lined in a band of steel Each greave the hide of ten thousand animals and studsBe lining, each an iron column, a vile spike that drip darkThis blood, and he hold in hand a sword, in other an axe The Axe was Baa'shavat, the head a thousand thricedTons of iron, rusted but fearsome, it bearing a hilt be aTrunk of the Tree of Eden, thin doth it embrace Babel! The Sword was Baratha, a great blade to dip in curve soAnd it be two leagues long, of Iron of the Meteors, of theSteels of Dimashiq, the weapon of the Pale Rider ahead His horns of wrath had twisted and touched skies, an ivoryBlade piercing the clouds as well. He flit seven wings trulyAll of malice and evil, the vile things that mock all life were Corruption stand, congealed scum drippeth from defilers'Blade, lapping the viler airs from the dead petrified windsThat kill all life and let rest no soul if he be holy or evil so Pestilence, the reaper blade call to the grave all be it pass!To touch its icy razing tongue upon the shrill fiery meadow!To take in its wings the hearts of all, and smother them so! Wrath, lashing whip of fire as well embrace tail. So seen!So witnessed! Drippeth blood abast oft thee, of wind fromVile Rains, that defile all life and take life from the wombs Carnality, raping tongue of the Mother of He, taken in life soThat the world is turned to nothing in its vile ashen ways beThe rife winds spread seeds discord amongst this innocent Violence be oft of His way, He breathes it to Earth, shearEarth with each pass, so that it shall be razed by the vileEvil that so wrapth it in warmth and life, and it shall bleed Nightmare, to fracture thy soul, and take all, it shall devourIt has now taken a hold of the mind as it did the life and noSilent dream can claw it and the fetter it holds hard enough And Damnation, the light of Hell, antithesis of a world beThe world scoff at it, and the world is torn by the flame aDragon shall vomit uponst it, and shall fear it for all time! So I tell thee, fear it if it had come, pain shall occur furtherlyBut not to Ghilalash, for in a man who hath naught left to soLose, the only thing to come shall be victory, but death pass AKATA DOYUE UITIL CHAXL ------------------------------------------ The next two Akatas are coming soon. Feedback? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SubjectProphet Posted March 14, 2012 Share Posted March 14, 2012 That's great, a lot of... what should I call it?..... emotion. To bad my English is too terrible for the unknown words there, or I'd enjoy it better. I figured it out step by step though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragonspyre Posted March 14, 2012 Author Share Posted March 14, 2012 Yeah, it's a complex prose, and a lot of words are constructed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragonspyre Posted March 19, 2012 Author Share Posted March 19, 2012 ATAKA TOKUYEKETE Bii'shavath, wrapped in flames uponst roaring skyBlackened miasma curlst uponst heaven's now, aBane uponst the coldened airs of the icy gate so! O, yet yea, doth this man, Ghilalash, have not fearEven as the wrath of Maelbolge loom in distant soA way, though relict are the icy waters of his soul! He standeth on top the mountain to see his foesThe daemon and the darkness, but still did stayHe, for Ghilalash was to give all out, for he was! Heart of ilex bound in twine about boulder bound!Thee speak and spake I, Ghilalash stood stoiclyA man that had lost all to fight with all his valour! Ghilalash said in violent fury, tempest bast withIn the whitewalls of his breast, to the Daemon:"Fight, for thy life shall be ash and void today!" Bii'shavath bellowed a cry to shatter whole TerraAnd raise high Baa'shavat, razing the air and soPiercing the sky like mail, shattered it like glass Baa'shavat burrowed deep into the wall of ZionSo voracious it's bloodthirst that it fissure it soMuch that hardly still that his foe on Zion stay Ghilalash climbed the colossus before him, thatGreat axe's head, as he ignore the crimson rainThat floweth down his hands, onto the iron crag As Bii'shavath raised his axe, Ghilalash leaptFromst the ledges of great splinter to anotherAs he ascended the behemoth weapon quick Utima try but his best to shake the man, but heCould not break the vicegrip that so fiercely wasBound to the arm, and desperations made it fall The pommel mount, so did Ghilalash now soarFrom Baa'shavat, and drove his blades deep inBii'shavath, enough to stay himself onto beast! Bii'shavath slung Baratha towards Ghilalash vainIn way, for lost way an attempt to stop the causeAnd Ghilalash dove top Baratha, burying a spear The spear sank, and chained well was it by theMan Ghilalash, as Bii'shavath brought back theBlade, knowing not he gave Ghilalash chances O, how Ghilalash leapt, his great blade on hand!He took it and tore the cheek of the beast hardlyCutting him, but as he slashed, be a great ravine Bii'shavath was razed further and further, by soLittle as a mere man, but a man with a soul ofHonour, Valour, and Power, unbeatable a spirit Ghilalash sate tirelessly his sword as the beastCame to die, paralyzed by the anguish of a riverOf his blood that the ground imbibes in pleasure Terra shall have bound in time him to coffin oftOf vine and weed and flower, but asked he so:"Beaten? How, by what was to be left to die?" "How, how can I be one to die Tiamat's Flames?Hath I not served my master as thee thine? HowI ask, that for thou art in loss of, you fought so?" Ghilalash said, gazing with no pain or death orFear in Bii'shavath's eye, "Take to thy death soThis: That I fought because I have nothing left!" "Thy power was great, but doth not power lie nowGreatly in but in man, a man, who hath been tornAll apart, whose all was razed by thee, I had to." "Had to thee, have this fate be done, bind the toA graceless tomb, to let whoever is left be let sonow to see what we have triumphed over today." Bii'shavath spake, as life left him, "Thy words sayLife stands but thee, but none were left to live. SoHad my Master told me but to kill all, O so I did." Ghilalash saw the beast die, and Ghilalash stayOn the field, branding weapons fromst the spoilsWhich were large too much to hath carried at all Ghilalash walk, battered and bruised, his blood soThick upon his coat of hide that it was as if dye, OHad he quested in void World now in search of Life ATAKA TOKUYEKETE, UITIL CHAXL ATAKA PHAKIHYAEYE Three years to a score had Ghilalash been vagrantThat his life was empty and hollow a shell, lookingFor but a branch, leaf, or even the core of any man But null was effort, for he had traveled these landMasses that bind the caked and shackled Earth!And in all his time, naught to have been seen so! The lands be blackened by the ashes, for a violentPower of Bii'shavath had eternally made dead livesBut all remaining in world of glassen ash and sand Ghilalash had belted forth the words to the worldSo harshly: "Be there anything left? Or is so myFate of Death delayed but harsh cruel demons?" In the distance spake a dragon, massive and largeTo Ghilalash: "If Death is thy relief, I will deprive soGreatly thee of it, and of rest, damnation be here." "Come have I out of the rain, to cough, retch andSpout into the clouds a plague of Death, but thisSilent rain of massacre shall never pierce thee!" "O, hear me, I, the Dragon of Old, serpent who hasEyes of venom and whose charred spines reach allClouds, and I lift mine tail, Rape Tongue to all sky." "Hear me, for I am Lucifer, whose pawns thou nowFor Seventeen Years had rid the world of, and nowI hold mine claws high, and take to air as you die." The Dragon, Lucifer, Father of Rape as False God IMay note he be equal, ascended, his eight blackerWings thrust gales upon the East Wind furious so! Ghilalash took in his hands of tattered leather wrapAnd the rusted iron of long ago, hands aged greatlyto battle against the Dragon, who overshadows man The Dragon dove, as Ghilalash raze Lucifer's neckWith his sword, which shattered in time, for it wasNow so weak from rot and blunt way, even as it be Ghilalash had sliced his belly by the razors of a handOf Lucifer, and Ghilalash stood weaker than a DragonSlayer had to need to be, and Lucifer now so did land A sword from Baratha made, held Ghilalash, and asLucifer snapped his Draconic jaws at Ghilalash, ourHero of Old, Ghilalash, had buried Baratha in Lucifer Pierced be the bone and crest of the Dragon, as it dieIt could only vomit up the bloody foam in its throat, toSay as it lay slowly to waste away, message now so Lucifer weakly spake, "O, O'erst is mine battle andThine, but I shall devote my last, final, and ultimateBreath to claw to kill thee as holiness end its time" Lucifer slashed with his weary, weak mass GhilalashAnd so with this, the blood floweth fromst both, as soThe Dragon Lucifer lay dead already, Ghilalash spake Ghilalash said in stoic pride, "With this I end an evilAnd with me shall die the final one of this world. SoGo I to my grave, As I leave Terra so desolate now." AKATA PHAKIHYAEYE, UITIL CHAXL UITIL CHAXL, AMEN ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- So, comments on the finished story? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keanumoreira Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 Very nice. Sounds like something you would expect to find in a high school literature book, perhaps a college one as well. Very well done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragonspyre Posted April 1, 2012 Author Share Posted April 1, 2012 Thanks. It was pretty heavily inspired by things that WERE in a literature book: Beowulf and Gilgamesh. Pretty nice though, to have one of my works treading water on the first page of DG, and not stuck on the second page. :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maharg67 Posted April 3, 2012 Share Posted April 3, 2012 Excellent, interesting, will read this more than once! :thumbsup: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragonspyre Posted April 3, 2012 Author Share Posted April 3, 2012 Will read more than once... First time I've heard that... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brittn Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 I agree with what has been stated already. I enjoyed this story very much. ^-^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragonspyre Posted April 4, 2012 Author Share Posted April 4, 2012 Well, thanks for the great feedback! Since I know all this work will just fade into obscurity in time, it's nice to know it's appreciate in the meantime. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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