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So Skyrim is Now Real


Thatdoesntworklikethat

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I probably would have ended up in the boring Bard College and written songs... :facepalm:

 

Would have never been able to marry any of them disdainful housecarls - they would have beheaded me the minute I passed the door o_O

 

Or the first dragon that came my way would have fried me to a crisp!.. (seriously, kill a dragon with these toothpicks, come on!...).

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I'd probably own an Inn.

 

I've never been much of a follower so I wouldn't be a guard or a member of a guild. I don't like being told what to do.

 

I'm a nightclub manager in real life and I really love my work so that's probably my spot. I think I'd prefer the safety of walls too so one of the cities. Village life would be too quiet for me.

 

I like hiking so maybe an explorer but even in real life I get a little nervous in woods and stuff by myself. That added to the realistic possibility of stuff jumping out on me wouldn't be something that interests me

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Personally, I'd get together with a blacksmith and an alchemist. From there, we'd find funding to start our project: Building Tamriel's first guns. After perfecting a few prototypes of varying caliber, I'd sell some of the weaker, simpler guns and blueprints to the highest bidder for considerable profit. I'm talking give them a musket while I design a semi-automatic rifle. I would then use that money to fund research on a more powerful, possibly automatic weapon. Assuming the gun designs were worth enough, I'd also hire a small army of body guards at this point. Using my new arsenal and small army, I'd find the the camps of local skooma dealers, bandits and slavers--I'd raid their camps and appropriate anything of value. Seeing as I'm not one for slavery, I'd allow the slaves the option of walking away or joining my army.

 

I'd use the spoils of my bandit raids to increase my army's size and continue on in that manner until I had a pretty sizable force; all the while turning out more, higher quality guns. Then, I'd begin renting my force out to governments and other organizations (a la Blackwater).

 

By this point I'm fairly wealthy, well-armed and I would assume that my contracts have netted me at least a little governmental influence. I'd pretty much live out the high life and if Alduin reared his ugly head, I'd see how well dragonscale stands up to .50CAL bullets. Wolves and such wouldn't be much of a problem as guns handle that fairly well. My only real threat would come in the form of the Dark Brotherhood and rival contractors (do those exist in Skyrim?) so I'd flex my metaphorical muscle and Destroy the Dark Brotherhood.

 

From there, it's just a matter of running a small army which isn't by any means easy, but it's better than going at a sabercat with a sword.

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Assuming I survived Helgen, I'd go with Ralof or Hadvar to riverwood, get a job at Hod's lumber mill. Then, when I'm rich enough selling firewood, I'd buy some armor, hire a mercenary, and travel to Whiterun. From there, I'd stay in the Bannered Mare, have some cheese, then buy a carriage ride to Solitude. I'd apply at the Bard's college, where I an study history. There, I'd also dabble in science, and 'discover" a ton of scientific theories that are commonplace in reality (I'm glad I never fell asleep in science class). I'd also generate income by publishing popular book series like Harry Potter and The Hunger Games. If they sell (why wouldn't they), I'd make enough money to buy Proudspire Manor. Then, I'd find a hot wench, settle down, have a family, and be set for life. Just to be safe, I'd kill old Grelod, and stay awake all night, so that when Astrid comes to kidnap me, I'll simply kill my precaptured hostage that I ingeniously hid in the closet, and go to the Sanctuary (I can stop there). I'd also buy a share in the Black-Briar Meadery, effectively guaranteeing safety from both the Dark Brotherhood and Theives Guild. And, as a nice touch, I might also be able to just bribe my way into Elisif's court, guaranteeing importance in the Hold until the world inevitably implodes because I didn't kill Aldluin. Edited by Dovahkiin234
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