The last poster wins

[Werne]

:ohdear: I'm scared and terible affraid. I've got massevly threated . Fist balled allready twice over the head of the offender called me to get out side with him that way. it is nice to have panick attacks and try to be calm and neutral but he wouldnt listen to anything. Everything i had to say it arroused him only more.

I find that after someone threatens you and wants to fight you, staying perfectly calm and staring at him while having an evil, maniacal smile on your face solves it right quick, he even apologizes.

 

However, while most people who use that method fake the facial expression to appear as insane sadists, my face just reflects the thoughts inside my head.

[Thor.]

Call the police, its only far to say it was only a coincidence that one particular police officer did that to you. Explain the situation in great detail, its the only way to make it work in your favour

[Ironman5000]

I would usually advise not to let aggressive wankers like that provoke you, and don't acknowledge his threats because it's likely just that most of the time. Many people try to intimidate but don't have the balls to follow through.

[SilverDNA]

 

I find that after someone threatens you and wants to fight you, staying perfectly calm and staring at him while having an evil, maniacal smile on your face solves it right quick, he even apologizes.

 

 

However, while most people who use that method fake the facial expression to appear as insane sadists, my face just reflects the thoughts inside my head.

 

I appreciate your thoughts Werne. I'm not sadistic or evil only a guy that doesn't wants to threatened for the idiocy of others. but i liked your thought it did cast a smile on my face. i know that one was delivered by the the little Werne inside you the one I have come to know a bit and i think i know why you are who you are now and this make you in my eyes a great good guy (ggg) :smile: :wink:

Edit:

I would usually advise not to let aggressive *censored*ers like that provoke you, and don't acknowledge his threats because it's likely just that most of the time. Many people try to intimidate but don't have the balls to follow through.

I didn't threaten theme or used powerful words. i'm a typical nerd with nerdy behavior. sociological i tried to tell them what they are supporting and why. On a behavior analysis I'm far to familiar with. the funny thing is they heard only what they wanted to hear and didn't think a minute a bit father than a snail slimes by in the same time .

Edited June 22, 2013 by SilverDNA

[naomis8329]

@ Werne, I agree with Silver :yes:

 

My son is 15 going on 35... He's prepubescent and driving his father and I insane. We found out yesterday that my husband's father is dying of bone cancer after beating bowel cancer just after Christmas like my husband (he got the all clear from throat cancer around the same time). We're all naturally devastated yet my eldest son keeps shouting and screaming at us all. I employe favoritism against him and am a terrible mom etc etc etc. I know he's hurting but this has been going on for some time, so this is the most recent trigger for his behavior and I must admit I'm not going to let him use it as an excuse to get away with calling me names nor letting him denigrate his brother and sisters.

 

He's been quite threatening towards me which is beginning to make my blood boil and, although I don't condone violence, I do have a temper which, when in full swing has lead to me knocking out the protagonist on two occasions :whistling: This is not something I am proud of but being a little over 5 foot, I have learned to protect myself just in case someone gets too frisky with me lol.

 

To say I'm too tired to take his shenanigans is an understatement. We've been through too much the past 6/7 years and so his tantrums are not needed.

 

Honestly I thought my girls being hormonal was bad, boys/young men are amazingly horrendous lol.

 

Other than locking him under the stairs until he's 21, any advice???

[Thor.]

I feel sorry for you that the fact you have someone you love dear has cancer, my Grandmother died of Lung Cancer, and thats considered the worst kind not to long ago :( funny thing she never suffered any pain, which was remarkable considering what she went through :(

Edited June 22, 2013 by Thor.

[naomis8329]

I think that the fact he beat one aggressive form of cancer and then found out that he has another and that it is too far gone for them to do anything has really thrown us and Bill is now anxious as it has made him realise that just because he has beaten one, it doesn't mean he is safe.

 

The kids are my other main concern as they've been through so much and have taken it all in their stride. This latest tragedy is just another nail in their psyche and like anyone else there is just so much a person can take before the fracturing becomes too much to repair.

[SilverDNA]

@ Werne, I agree with Silver :yes:

 

My son is 15 going on 35... He's prepubescent and driving his father and I insane. We found out yesterday that my husband's father is dying of bone cancer after beating bowel cancer just after Christmas like my husband (he got the all clear from throat cancer around the same time). We're all naturally devastated yet my eldest son keeps shouting and screaming at us all. I employe favoritism against him and am a terrible mom etc etc etc. I know he's hurting but this has been going on for some time, so this is the most recent trigger for his behavior and I must admit I'm not going to let him use it as an excuse to get away with calling me names nor letting him denigrate his brother and sisters.

 

He's been quite threatening towards me which is beginning to make my blood boil and, although I don't condone violence, I do have a temper which, when in full swing has lead to me knocking out the protagonist on two occasions :whistling: This is not something I am proud of but being a little over 5 foot, I have learned to protect myself just in case someone gets too frisky with me lol.

 

To say I'm too tired to take his shenanigans is an understatement. We've been through too much the past 6/7 years and so his tantrums are not needed.

 

Honestly I thought my girls being hormonal was bad, boys/young men are amazingly horrendous lol.

 

Other than locking him under the stairs until he's 21, any advice???

I think you son is afraid of getting cancer too and can't ( for his age quite normal) express his fears. Sorry to hear this about your hubby's father ( sorry i'm still a bit over edge) This is sad.

Edited June 22, 2013 by SilverDNA

[Ironman5000]

My little brother was a little brat like this too and we clashed physically all the time, but eventually I ended having to actually dominate him to get him over himself. I just gave him some correction here and there, not violently but more psychologically to prove to him he not the centre of everyone's attention. Dunno if it was the right way to go but he now knows his place with me and I get the proper respect from him.

 

Sorry to hear about your stepfather Naomis.

[tetradite]

@ Werne, I agree with Silver :yes:

 

My son is 15 going on 35... He's prepubescent and driving his father and I insane. We found out yesterday that my husband's father is dying of bone cancer after beating bowel cancer just after Christmas like my husband (he got the all clear from throat cancer around the same time). We're all naturally devastated yet my eldest son keeps shouting and screaming at us all. I employe favoritism against him and am a terrible mom etc etc etc. I know he's hurting but this has been going on for some time, so this is the most recent trigger for his behavior and I must admit I'm not going to let him use it as an excuse to get away with calling me names nor letting him denigrate his brother and sisters.

 

He's been quite threatening towards me which is beginning to make my blood boil and, although I don't condone violence, I do have a temper which, when in full swing has lead to me knocking out the protagonist on two occasions :whistling: This is not something I am proud of but being a little over 5 foot, I have learned to protect myself just in case someone gets too frisky with me lol.

 

To say I'm too tired to take his shenanigans is an understatement. We've been through too much the past 6/7 years and so his tantrums are not needed.

 

Honestly I thought my girls being hormonal was bad, boys/young men are amazingly horrendous lol.

 

Other than locking him under the stairs until he's 21, any advice???

 

 

Opposite advice to Ironman. Hard as it is, stop reacting so much to it. Control your temper, respond only when absolutely necessary and in the calmest most logical way possible. If reacting so much to it hasn't eased the situation any then try the reverse. He knows what your response is likely to be at the minute and this clearly isn't stopping him, I'd argue he's actually seeking a strong visceral response. He says you are favouriting against him, and this at a time when you and your family's focus is naturally and rightly elsewhere: he's at least partially attention seeking.

 

Interesting you say "tantrums" if he was younger and having "tantrums" stop responding to them would be pretty standard advice.

 

Either way, with both the stressful specifics of your situation, and his age, don't expect miracles or anything to have a huge impact in the short run. Time will do the most work.