Still need help

[TheCalliton]

Hey all, I'm sorry for asking for help again, but you guys are people I trust.

 

I posted a while ago about some problems i am having, and I have gone downhill. I've started cutting regularly, and I feel awful. Things are better with my dad, but school is worse, my mom is still awful, and I still feel worthless.

 

 

I cant walk up to school without any happiness im feeling just going away, and my folks don't think ill graduate. I think they are right. I don't really know what to say, I know its a shocker, I just can't go to anyone else. You guys are probably my best friends.

 

I know I haven't been around lately, this is because my dad just doesnt seem to want me to have internet, I am siphoning off the neighbors now, and I probably wont see this topic again untill tomorrow.

 

I'm really sorry if I piss off or offended anyone, but I don't know who else to talk to.

[Vagrant0]

I hate to break it to you, but your father is right, life sucks. Life sucks bad for just about everyone, and feeling depressed and hurting yourself will only make it suck worse. I've been there, and didn't even have a girlfriend or others to help me through it. I only had myself. I realized two simple things;

 

1). Dying hurts more than living, quick or slow, it still hurts you and those who are around you more than you may be able to realize now, even if you don't think others care about you, they do, and your passing will only being them extreme pain and sadness that will linger the rest of their lives because they will be asking "what did I do wrong?". That is never a good thing, even if you happen to want to make them suffer. Suicide is a sin for a good reason, it robs the world of not only a life that often has so much potential, but brings tragedy and despair to those around that person.

 

2). Answers aren't going to just magically appear. If you want to shake this funk, you have to want it and put the effort toward getting your life back on track. Cutting yourself, distancing yourself from family (even if it seems like they want to distance themselves from you) is only doing more harm. The road back to humanity is long and difficult, but it is a journey that will make you a much stronger and richer person than most everyone else. Don't EVER give up. There is help out there, but you have to be willing to reach for it and trust others to help you through this (you may not like what people say, but hear them out).

 

Your issues with your parents are likely because they don't know how to connect with you, what they do see of you is a depressed and distracted person they care about and they don't know what to do about it. Be patient, focus on your school, and try to accept the words of your father, "life sucks", he knows, he's likely been there several times. This is all the 'joy' of growing up, don't let it break you.

[HeyYou]

Yeah, gotta concentrate on getting thru school. These days, if you don't have a high school diploma, you are basically screwed. Don't worry about the stuff you can't change, do what you can with what you got, and let the rest deal with itself.

[Flintlockecole]

Dying isn't worth it in any sense, even in my darkest hour I still got up and patched myself up. Theres always hope for a better day even if it seem's far off.

[Vindekarr]

Indeed.

 

A wise quote I once heard, from a NASCAR team boss, was: "Everyone falls eventualy, it's just a matter of how gracefuly you pick yourself back up" Never give up. Never. Bad times pass, no matter how bad bad is. Furthermore I'd recomend seeing a doctor about this, I went through a similarly extreme spiral of depression in my late teens and was able to make a complete recovery with a doctor's help. Despression like this isn't just in your mind, it's a physiological event, and a biochemical one-you can't feel better if your biochemical balance is out of whack. And remember: you're not the only one who's gone through this. Speaking for my own family my mother, father, aunty, two uncles, four cousins, and grandfathers on both sides were clinicaly depressed, it's hardly an uncommon illness, and help is out there ffor you, from us, and from the medical system in general. I also very very strongly urge you to take this to a doctor, depression is something they're specificaly trained to be able help with.

[TheCalliton]

guys, im not suicidal

i just figured that if i tell someone, I might take that first step to getting back to normal

im sorry if i bothered anyone.

[Vindekarr]

guys, im not suicidal

i just figured that if i tell someone, I might take that first step to getting back to normal

im sorry if i bothered anyone.

 

Don't be, but you need to take action, mate. Do regular excercise, keep yourself busy, and see a doctor as soon as your able, if you keep trying to go along in life thinking this'll go away, it won't, but if you start taking action, it will and you'll eventualy feel somewhat mopre normal again.

[JimboUK]

You should really see a professional, people here can offer support and encouragement but it isn't a substitute for seeing someone qualified to help you.

[Halororor]

I skimmed through the previous thread to get an idea of what you're going through, so I might still not be entirely up to date, but all I can say is to just tough it out. I know it sucks living in such circumstances, but that's really the best option right now. You can, if you like, talk to your parents about this (perhaps your mom, as they're usually the softies), and tell her what you're going through and what it's doing to you. If you don't want to talk to them about it, that's also fine. If you do and they respond negatively or if things don't start improving at all, screw them. I know it sounds harsh, but remember, one of these ays you're going to graduate and then you can move out and you never have to see them again.

 

Just do the best you can with what they provide for you. Use them for their money to get an education. I know it's easier said than done, but try to lift your grades. I'm not a big one to talk about grades, as I scraped all the way through school, but I can tell you, I feel sorry for not studying harder almost every day. It's only a few years of hard work, and unfortunately those few years determine most of your future, so just persevere. And trust me, I know how hard that is. As I'm sitting here, I have to study for a test I'm writing on Monday, which I haven't even started studying for. Procrastination is a very easy habit to fall into, but if you can break it, you're not going to regret it for the rest of your life. Remember, if you get bad grades, it's going to stay with you all your life and you're going to end up regretting it for a long time, but if you just push through and get decent grades, you're more or less set for life.

 

As for the cutting, stop immediately. I know it might help on the short term, but think of the long term implications. I've got a friend who came out of rehab two years ago, having more or less cut himself to ribbons. He's literally got hundreds of scars all over his body, on his legs, chest, arms. He doesn't only regret it because it was bad for him, he regrets it because he's going to live with those scars(emotional and physical) for the rest of his life. Where ever he goes, people see them. If he decides to apply for a job, he's going to have to put it on his CV. And believe me, people are assholes, they judge anything they don't understand. So I'm not asking you to stop because it's bad for you in the short term, I'm asking you because I don't want you to have to live with that for the rest of your life.

[AncientSpaceAeon]

http://d3uwin5q170wpc.cloudfront.net/photo/3107_700b_v1.jpg

 

That, doesn't makes sense, does it? I really hope it does, for you especially.

Edited June 3, 2011 by Ancient Aeon