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Funniest kill


Argomirr

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So Im being chased by close to 50 guards as Nemesis, and I decide that enough is enough, I swing around, wielding the sword of Khorne and imediately am hit with this bitchy little imperial woman yelling, STOP! you violated the law! at which pointy I used one of my hand crafted retorts "too weak to fight then? cease your prattle and FIGHT!" at which point the fighting starts.

 

It wasnt a fair fights, she and her comrades were weak little level 65s, Im level 145, so it was no contest, but anyway. Dark Lord that I am, I slaughter tham all in a single use of "kull the weak"(aoe megahealth absorb) but the imperial pest who initialy challenged me survived somehow.

 

So I decided to finish it all off with a special kill, unfortunately my hand programmed superkills didnt take into account my "khornerage" (temporary strength gain for kill) and after about 50 kills it was over 600, so instead of grabbing her by the throat, yelling a proposterous threat and throwing her off the nearby cliff, it instead trips the "over 300 strength" code trigger and instead I grab her by the throat, and pull her head, spine and neck right out of her body! I wasnt expecting it and I laughed my head off, it was just that gruesom. This infact adorned my desktop for a good while, Id upload a pic, but my pc wont let me at the moment, and it might give you nightmares to see my god of awesome character.

 

Another funny kill was when I cast frenzy on a crowd of people in Chorrol, this sent nearly 30 people into a bloddy frenzy, and 3 came straight at me, two I cut down with my bolter, but a third I sliced in half with a Manreaper, but, as is the Manreaper's enchantment, the corpse was then revived as a reanimate under my command, but because I sliced poor Goriath in two, I got a a levitating torso with an axe, and a set of seemingly possesed pants, running around punching with invisible fists and trailing bowls. It was absolutely hilarious, especialy when the killer pants slew Seed Neeus and Casta Scribonia, who on death, had their heads explode.

 

Lastly, I once punched farwil Indarys for being an arrogant ass and nearly getting himself killed, but I for a moment forgot Nemesis' true strength, and that I had Deadly Relfex on, with 344 strength and 101 unarmed, the poor little lordling's head exploded and showered my fist in gore, I didnt mourne and as programmed Nemesis simply shrieked BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! but it did make me rather giggle a bit, as it was an honest accident.

 

 

But funniest of all was casting Combustive Convulsion on Adoring Fan the first time, and watching him explode in a shower of entrails and organs, I laughed myself silly, especialy when I found amid the gore, 5 legs, 2 hearts, 3 lives, a single spring like intestine and 7 lungs.

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I remember I had murdered the adoring fan a few hours earlier and I was busy doing dark brotherhood quests. As I was walking in to the sanctuary I turn around and the adoring fan was standing right behind me. I freaked out and killed him as fast as I could, only to find that 5 minutes later hes alive again lol...
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I remember I had murdered the adoring fan a few hours earlier and I was busy doing dark brotherhood quests. As I was walking in to the sanctuary I turn around and the adoring fan was standing right behind me. I freaked out and killed him as fast as I could, only to find that 5 minutes later hes alive again lol...

I guess the Nine couldn't stand him either, so they brought him back to life LOL.

 

My funniest kill had to be after I escaped Miscarcand. Although I technically didn't do it, a NPC did (correction...NPCs). I didn't kill the ghost of the king of miscarcand, so about 2 weeks later I was in Skingrad and I had a huge bounty on my head (about 50,000) and while I was fighting guards, the ghost of that miscarcand king found me. I was like, "HOLY S***!" The guards then stopped attacking me and went after the lich. I sat back and watched as the guards were attacking the lich. I ran and it follows me until I was able to fast-travel. I head to Anvil's Docks, and what do you know....the lich was there along with the Skingrad guards, Imperial foresters, and Anvil guards. They fight and then all of them fall in the water and start fighting underwater! The lich was killed by an anvil guard, but then the guards start fighting each other! Now, imagine about 40 guards drowning at once.

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I remember when I was doing Mehrunes Razor quest and in the area where you can find vampires I killed one of those Drothmeri guys and after I killed everyone in that area and returned I saw that the guy was spinning like in this video.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Uhmm, it's not entirely funny but I just love to flings arrows to any enemies near the edge with my force arrow~ They would just hit the ground...hard! Or just a normal arrow~
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It wasn't me who did the killing but i was at the part of the Kvatch quest where we were about to enter the castle. Right before the door there is a group of scamps that fight your group. I had 2 archers,a warrior and a storyline npc. In the middle of the fight i notice one of the archers go down by another archers bow and arrow and the remaining npcs yell "someones been murdered!!" like usuall but then they killed the archer that killed the archer...Then they yelled "Murder!!" again then attacked each other until only one was left. I had to reload my game because the storyline npc bit the dust which was also a little wierd since those are usually essential npcs.
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What!?You can actualy stick spikes into enemys!?Is it a mod,because i would realy enjoy it! :P

 

You cannot actually do it in vanilla Oblivion, but often when an enemy lands on one, it gives that effect. (though the spike doesn't actually go through them it sticks to their skeleton or something.) Just try pinning bandits to doors with arrows inside wilderness houses, hitting people with magic weapons so they go flying into things, etc. all can be done in vanilla Oblivion. It's one of the fortunate things about its physics system.

where can I get vanilla oblivion?? I really want it

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