The ridiculously funny Sword names game

[Morticia01]

Tippexcalibur, corrects errors in the reality...

[Pagafyr]

Espada de fideos flácida (the sword that wobbles so much when you swing it, it sometimes gets twisted)

[zixi]

The Calculator.

This is an interesting one. It was developed by a duelling mathematician who was fed up with how the undertaker's hovered nearby, waiting to measure up the loser for a coffin. So, The Calculator works that out in advance. It also issues a bill for any damage to the bearer's clothing and sends that to the deceased's estate.

Incidentally, it has a titanium edge so it's light and extremely strong. Don't believe the stuff about never needs sharpening though...

[AaronOfMpls]

Ginsu -- it slices, it dices, it makes julienne enemies!  ...Until it starts to wear out, at which point you find it "never needs sharpening" because the metal is too brittle to properly sharpen.  Why you ever thought buying a katana from Brynjolf was a good idea, you'll never know.

[RedHeadAngel]

The Bat. A sword so dull, it's a bludgeoning weapon. 

[Pagafyr]

The Unbelievably largest sword or swords.

[zixi]

The Jabberwocky - it's a Vorpal sword. It's extremely useful in that you don't have to actually do anything. The sword will jabber away in nonsense until the intended victim dies of boredom (or runs away to escape the tedium). It is named for the vorpal sword in Lewis's poem for those of you who are interested in nomenclature.

[Pagafyr]

Maybe I could start a new thread called, The Ridiculously LARGE Swords.

[niphilim222]

This sword has been driving me nuts, hes life aware and joined a cooking class and refuses to cut people anymore, please help.. Self aware sword the cruellest joke of them all.

[ScytheBearer]

I found a burble blade.  When standing in water, when swimming or even when sitting is a shallow pool, holing this sword aloft will make bubbles appear behind the wielder.