Day Dreams of a Spaced out Old Man

[Deleted54170User]

I've passed the tests of many courses of knowledge and am experiencing health to a degree I feel like I should be finding a girlfriend to start a crop, make a home, and raise a family.

 

Problem is there seems to be a shortage of young women interested in the harsh life of farming, ranching, or any other of the dynamic lifestyles of self employment that isn't fun. All the colonies that still exist and I feel that I am stronger now, than I have ever been, since my goofing off with a sleeping bag air mattress gave me a surprise.

 

I was thinking, I may as well use this camping gear. An air mattress that uses our body heat to keep us warmer is what I was looking at. I thought, I'll never get to use this unless my health gets better. For the last few years I was thinking, I am likely never going to go on another hike adventure in the huge park system.

 

I decided, I am going to use this air mattress to see if it works like it is supposed to. I could save some money if I could stay warm with the temperature turned down to sixty five during winter nights. Well, I wheezed and puffed, blowing air into the thin sleeping bag air mattress. I was taking so long to fill it up I was about to start crying, like I am right now.

 

Well, I got it filled. As full as my lungs could pump it up. I was breathing to get my breath back for a minute. I mean, I felt like I had been challenged to get wind in the sail of a ship to get her moving.

 

Puff, wheeze, and coughing I remember once a long time ago my Mom, probably, told me to be careful when blowing up a balloon. Seems some people actually inhaled them and had to have someone pull them out of their throat. Well, I was looking at that mattress. Imagining it becoming lodged in my throat. I laughed out loud. Coughed, laughed some more.

 

Then I had that serious sentiment I used to get all the time when I was little. I'll show you! I'll do it better than you can!

 

I felt the way I did when some older sibling challenged me when I was younger. And not to made look stupid.

 

I grabbed that valve on the air mattress, Open it up. Took as deep a breath as I could and squeezed my stomach and chest pushing air out. I was going to fill that mat up so I could sleep on it full of air.

 

A couple days later. I decided to see if I could fill it up enough to get some support. I hadn't gotten it full enough to really make it comfortable yet. I huffed, coughed, and puffed.

 

Really giving it my all. I almost passed out.

 

There again I felt the childlike sensation I was being laughed at behind my back, my brothers or sisters was putting two fingers up behind my head, or something like that.

 

I was so beat after trying so hard to get that mattress filled just to be able to rest on it once, I gave up blowing into it. I still had my lips tight around the valve when I did.

 

The air in the mattress was filling my lungs up when I sat up feeling like a loser. I kind of thought the carbon dioxide would cause me to pass out. Then my chest gurgled, felt weird inside. It felt like a balloon was already in my chest. I thought maybe I'd inhaled it when I was little and it was as drastic as Mom made it seem.

 

It wasn't a balloon. It was the lung sack on my right side. It got inflated.

 

I'm still having trouble believing it. Each day though, I get better at breathing. I can feel it. I can feel the space opened up and when I work harder now I don't get winded so easily.

 

I'm more mobile. The aches and pains in my hips and back are fading away day after day. I even had an urge when I saw a lovely woman at the store today. I still hurt a little too much though.

 

I tell you though. It sure is good to be able to get all that extra air space to fill.

 

I walked a quarter of mile with little or no pain. In a day I am going to go for a half mile round trip instead of just one eight of mile from the car and back.

[Deleted54170User]

All of the people I had as friends back when matter to me now.

 

My lung repair was a miracle and now that my oxygen intake is better my memory is getting restored.

 

I hate to be a boy and cry, but if you've never felt the sense of getting your mind going thank your lucky stars for that.

 

Gradually I am getting back some balance.

 

I hope all of you are in good shape.

 

Stay healthy! All of you Winners!

[Deleted54170User]

My character can run! And it feels like a gentle breeze caressing my Power Armor without any sudden stops because of INVISIBLE problems CTDing the game.

I can leap, jump from tall buildings, dodge bullets, and run through the field in a firefight in my imagination again! Woo Hoo!

REMEMBER: When you are falling to your Death from a tall building, a high cliff, or any other extreme height; don't panic. It's not the fall that will kill you. Remain calm and try to figure out a way to save yourself. (Remaining calm helps especially if you have several thousand feet between you and the crash site. (also known as: THE GROUND.))

 

Use your jersey, trench coat, baggy sweatpants, or the boxer style shorts you have on (That you have changed several sizes in, since you began playing the video game and gorged yourself full of pizza's) as a parachute.

 

:confused: for you ladies you could use that fine dress I gave Veronica you have in your fallout backpack you are saving for a special occasion to slow your fall from High up, up high in the sky falls.

 

Because it's not the fall that kills your fun.

It's the sudden CTD!

[Deleted54170User]

I'm not the kind of person who gets knocked down once and quits, nor do I find losing a lifestyle job or some other thing like mod managers replacing my days as a helpful tech. I just get up and look at the new ways of living and learn it and live.

Here's an example of what I learned to do lately. I learned to travel in a T. A. R. D. I. S. and be reminded I am human after-all.

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So! You've been told you are a person from the future.

Possibly a Timelord.

Inspired by the person who talked to you, you find a way to get to the blue box as quickly as possible. Ah! At last you've made it. After a few deadly run ins with raiders, wild animals, and others living on the Mojave to fight for survival; you made it to the blue box.

Such a thrill! And yet there you are after only helping Sunny Smiles clear the water supply area of Gecko's, Ringo get his freedom back, and a couple of battles with people trying kill you.

You've become the owner of a T. A. R. D. I. S.. Your T.A.R.D.I.S. don't forget because that was you telling you that you were from the future and somehow you didn't remember all of the details.

You've patched up the T.A.R.D.I.S. and began learning to travel around the Vegas Mojave.

You get your pilot's license and even go as far as becoming a level 15 pilot.

During while you were training a phone rang. You being a normal human still, answered it. It wasn't anyone you knew, so why did you do it? Hunh?!

Not once, but every time it rang you answered it. Now I know that's a lot to take in on the cuff at the moment. But the calls were, you thought, jobs. Jobs earn you lots of money. Right?!

You don your new suit, pack your sonic screwdriver and head out the door to do some of those jobs. Sure enough there are some caps in it for you. While you're at it the reason you got started after waking up from being shot in the head seems to fade out of your mind. While you're exploring, landing where ever the randomizer zig zag plotter takes you, you find you've arrived in places you've never been before. Aboard an alien spaceship, for one.

With a Galley, a Sick Bay, a bedroom fit for a Queen you begin to get relaxed. No Mojave run of the mill battles, no weird people dressed funny, and no creatures that make aliens from outer space look tame.

Well, there you are. You're having a life of relaxed and unconcerned travel. The world is a fine place to visit and some of the places you drop by are fantastic. Scenery, modern homes, and some of the strangest plant life. One day though, you wake up early in the morning you hear a noise.

The ships display says there is something wrong in one of the rooms that can be materialized. Still, the human Neophyte, you respond and make the room so you can go see what the problem is.

You've already been in all the rooms exploring their wondrous perks. The Art Gallery appears to have something new though. A bright white light beamed through a crack in the wall where a painting used to be. The crack in the wall wasn't there before.

You testily walk up to it. Fearing it might draw you in and send you far from the ship into some unimaginable horror. Still thinking like a human. Which, like it or not, you're slowly beginning to realize you're not. Still you don't jump to the crack to find out what it is. You get out your sonic screwdriver and scan for life forms. Maybe someone is hiding. Invisible to your eyes, your sonic screwdriver will spot hiding in the art gallery. You think!

You didn't leave any of the other rooms on? Did you?

After some serious thought you moved closer. You touched the light coming through the crack. Someone speaks. You about jump back across the room. You understand the words. You move closer and try to talk to whoever. It's a new way to communicate. The phone ringing off the hook was old fashion and familiar. Nothing like this. You answered it! Human as you are, you just couldn't help yourself and answered it.

The caller tells you you're, along with all the people of the home world where your T.A.R.D.I.S. was created is, in trouble.

I know. You wondered why the painting was missing. This is when you found out.

A problem bigger than any you've had. Nothing like the problem of folding all the papers before delivering the newspapers, delivering a platinum chip (remember now?!) and the voice coming through the crack in the wall's light communication device is causing you the fright of a lifetime. You still answered it!

The caller tells you the death of all the people from the home world will happen if you don't do something about it. You're still you, remember. Still human.

The many trips to sickbay, after battles, has made you better, save for a spot in the right side of your chest that seems to be sore and throbbing, everything else is fine.

You notice a little more goop when you cough. A squeaking noise in your chest that almost sounds like it could be talking. But hey! You're just lonely. A little ventriloquist idea occurred to you too. Suggesting to get the squeak in that tube to sound like a person. No panic, right?!

Little advice. I found out there was another guy who found out he was a timelord. He was banished for his crime. Destined to suffer on a little known planet he visited so many times you know what he did was bound to happen. Eventually. So, you think. Not why you are the way you are. What do you suppose his crime was? My advice is, "Don't even think about it!"

He too regained his memories. Only he found his T.A.R.D.I.S. because of a scavenger having sniffed around and found his gear.

The thing here is, you're still thinking like a human. You walk back to the control room. Wondering how you're going to get to the places the voice said you need to go. The voice told you; you need to go to.

For the third time a holograph appears and begins training you to fly the T.A.R.D.I.S.. Is your hair turning white yet? Human as I am I still find holographs sending me holograms spooky. But like you, human, I forget about the other thoughts in all the excitement. You're getting your outer space flight training. Yay!

Sure enough the instructor, who you saw first, not the old guy who gave you your advanced flight license, is there to show you the way to fly into and around in outer space. Wow! Hunh.

Now to the greater problem that you probably never even thought about. Afterall, during your time at Freeside, while you pondered the dilemna you were in. The companion asked to see more of the place. Your new friend and co-partner, for adventures, walks by a guy whose telling everyone about the weapons inside the store he is in front of and what it has to offer. You go after your new friend, because you told the person not to wander too far off, and into a dark street you go.

At the end of the street near a wall of rocks a stranger appears.

Now this is what I was on about in the first place. Remember the fun and good times going randomly around the Mojave and New Vegas. Did you enjoy it?! I did, and I am, and I will be for a long time after.

I walked up to the guy. He told me he could smell the artron on me for a long ways away. It suddenly occurs to me that this guy is a total spacer. And that he must have something to do with painting piece I need.

I asked him a lot of questions which got me no closer to the painting piece. I asked to see what he is selling. Do you know how much he wants for that scrap? I don't have and didn't think I would need that many caps! Ever again. Back to basic human thinking, I went.

You know, put my hands in my pockets, checked my hidden stash in my private area, and found I was a little shy of caps. 5502 to be exact. My first human thought. As usual. I'm going to have to go find a job!

You can image me with both hands in my pockets, slouching, grumbling about how to get a lot of caps in time to save a bunch of people on a planet far, far away somewhere that I am only now beginning to realize are my people. Feeling down and out, my heart thumping sadly in my chest. And the sore spot in my chest on the right side throbbing. That squeaking little noise begins and it seems alarmingly excited.

I turn, slouched, dragging my feet, bow my head, and try to think as I walk back to the Blue Police Box.

Here it is in a nutshell. Human who found out he's not, has finally begun to enjoy the travel and minor adventures, when a call from a person from his home planet unknown to him at that moment, sends him to find a painting's scraps that will save their lives. Did he think he can finally get to know his people again. No! He's so down and out without enough caps at Freeside where the streets aren't made of caps. What he's thinking are miserable thoughts.

Sure enough the instructor, who you saw first, not the old guy, is there to show you the way to fly into and around in outer space. Wow! Hunh?

There are some complications after you get trained to control the Astronav settings. The first problem is, that after getting the coordinates so you get into a drift near Sol-3 the next places X- #; Y- #coordinates you have to go to isn't known. Right back on Earth Sol-3 you found yourself being pushed back into the Human Zone, right next door to The TWILIGHT ZONE!

Those are some complications after I get trained to control the Astronav settings. (Which I am still turning pages to learn how to do) The first problem is, that after getting the coordinates so I get into a drift near Sol-3 the next places X- #; Y- # coordinates I need to go to are a mystery.

Just drifting around in the Isop Galaxy waiting for a drift point to register a planet or something didn't have any effect. The X- #; Y- # coordinates? Do I need someone to spoon feed me the way to get the coordinates for the other places to dematerializing from outer space?

Anyone?!

I just need to know how to find the drift coordinates to get so I have a place to land for the T.A.R.D.I.S. to rematerialize. Where do I find a hologram to explain this part of the flying training?

Anyone?!

Is there an answer in the Beginners Guide for finding outer space places like Sol-3 to respond to the T.A.R.D.I.S. which doesn't have proper equipment to know what it looks like outside when it does materialize?

If I don't figure out some cap making scheme quick the people of Gallifrey are all going to perish. Yup! I'm just like all the other humans. Yup!

No banks, no rich peddlers, no rich people unless you call 100 caps rich, even that fancy dressed smooth talking well groomed guy behind that old building didn't have any caps, so, no way to get the 5502 caps I need, but to go out into the Mojave and work as a courier, while I try to find out where the guy went that stole that platinum chip and shot me in the head and left me for dead.

Now I need 5701 caps, because I just paid for my companion's ( from the space ship the SS Cirsus ) and my meal and drinks. Now wait. I'm missing something. I just know I am. I am human. Human? Human? There's that squeaking noise in my right chest cavity again. And it's not as sore, but it's, it's, I think it's thumping?!

It's THUMPING!!!

[Deleted54170User]

OH! Wow! What a relief. That wasn't another heart a thumping in my chest. That was my dog having a dream and his wooden leg pounding on the wooden floor.

 

He's a heavy sleeper. If he's having a good dream even if a fire truck siren gets close and goes by it will not wake him; and get him into the chase.

[Deleted54170User]

SNAIL FORUM RESPONSES on forums?! Wow! It's like SNAIL MAIL used to be, before the Internet became popular.

 

DISCORD is speedy relief from waiting for SNAIL FORUM RESPONSES.

 

Mod authors and friends of mod authors have it, click here < DISCORD > to download a copy for Fast FAST FAST responses to modding questions.

[Deleted54170User]

Over exerting myself often tires my mental parts of my brain and I could end up losing my train of thought.

Which in some cases angers me because I caused the brain to heat up too much and lost what I learned. I learned to stop the exercise, before I get too heated up, especially if I want remember what I learned.

Thoughts equal pictures of our experiences and when we work out a bunch of words to share our thoughts we can overheat our brains.

A lot of the words I have written in posts are just what I experienced wanting to share my thoughts and going on and on too long without giving my mind a rest. Words became jumbled and confusing. The words need continuity.

Words are what we describe our mental images with. Letters, numbers, and signs are what we combine to make words to combine, conjunctions that make sentences. Our thoughts are ordered in pix form, but not necessarily organized in any order that makes them a line of thought with meaningful ends.

In a camera we store images and our mind does so too. To make sense of images our attention is directed to an object among a bigger picture. Then a word describing that object gives it a name. For example, a bowl. Without any other word to suggest a kind of bowl we see the first one that we got an introduction to. We all may have seen a different bowl when we were introduced to them. So each of may have a different image with a different bowl recorded in our memory to associate to the word bowl.

This is simple method of memorizing. And to focus on an object among many more in a room full of different objects teaches us to be able to remember one item. While the items may all be in a room with the object we all think of when we heard the bowl.

To me this forum was where intended to discuss and learn about the use of words that unite all our minds. Until one day I realized that words other people posted didn't always focus my mind on what they were intentionally directing me to think about.

I realized how much like a child we were and how much like a child I became again. While reading other peoples sentences describing some part of what they wanted everyone to think, or internally grasp the images which we then used to set up. To see a mental image that they wanted to convey from their thoughts so we could see the image they discerned internally in their capacity to have thought creating images. Like a bowl.

Sanity is like a present selection of images that would all relate to one item we all know and know where that item is likely to be remembered. We remember where we saw a bowl, even the first bowl we learned was called a bowl is in our memory. And if we saw the bowl in a kitchen than we recognize the similarity when someone suggests a bowl used in kitchens.

If we saw a bowl on a table among other items on the table and someone refers to a bowl that is part of table setting we still can fathom an image of a bowl, if we understand what it's use is on a table for dining. If the bowl described we know not from our experience of seeing bowls then we must be able to see what the person is describing once. When we have seen it we add it to our memory. If the bowl is shown in the providers post so we see it we will recognize what they are referring to from then on when they think of it. With words they used to describe it in among a picture they showed.

When we are out and about roaming along in the city walking by windows full of items we might see a likeness of the bowl and that would be recalled in our mind. We then would have a stronger memory of one like it. It also would refresh our memory of the person who referred to it. We become able to collect more and more memories of images that serve to help us understand each other.

For instance, say, I needed a bowl to make a salad for everyone that was going to be at the table for a meal. Now I have added words that suggest a bowl's size requirements are needed and a new meaning without actually saying it. Measure.

The lines I write are sane as long as they are in a line in conjunction with words on a lane to get a desired result.

Insanity is when I do not write in a orderly fashion to describe a desired result. Just like writing a page to fill into a book of pages that could become a novel. The raw arrangement running from beginning to end takes focus on an image in my thoughts at the same time I am writing only a few seconds after the image is provided. I must maintain the image in my thought to process the words successfully so the sentences do what we call, make sense.

Sense is made as long as I can make words act like tools to draw a picture. Hopefully getting the words in a good way so the picture formed in my thoughts can be projected to you and you than see a reasonable account of what is in the picture. Not just the bowl in the picture, but the entire area that the bowl is in amongst.

That takes patience and the ability to recall the image when writing is going along word by word in a constructive way so what I write develops a picture in your thought you construct that is close enough to my words so you see what I have mentally photographed and am conveying to you in words.

You actually produce a picture in your own thought if my words are all arranged with descriptions of items we both have a collection of in our memories.

If I used enough items descriptions, that you recognize, items I know of that you haven't from my point of view may well occur to you because the others defined in my drawing them would share a place like we both know. For example; the kitchen.

I have tired my mind to the degree I need to rest so the new arrangement of words I have shared will be stored before I write for a time longer causing me to tire using up more energy which I need to make it so I remember this moment. Along with the effort to sustain my new learned wisdom and not lose it because I over worked my brains muscle while building the theme for Writing about images we have in our thoughts we want to share.

Nap time!

[Deleted54170User]

I've been feeling the Covid-19 vaccine effects since that Saturday morning I got the vaccination. Mild as they may be I still can tell my body is having company with new bunch of microscopic travelers in my body.

 

I feel comfortable warm almost all the time. Then without notice I feel comfortable cool for a short while.

 

If I open the window to let in fresh air in the morning and the air is cool when I am feeling cool it is kind of chilling. I put on more clothes, until I am comfortable again. When I am warm constantly, the outside morning air gives me a sense like I feel good. Good enough to wear a T-shirt and trousers for the day.

 

I got the Johnson & Johnson vaccine and it only requires one time. I won't be waiting for another shot when 28 days rolls around like the other brand vaccine. I will have 11 days since I got the vaccine under my belt in the morning of Wednesday April 21, 2021. I've gotten so accustomed to the 14 day home quarantine I barely thought about it much. Now that I have gotten the vaccine I realize I will be getting used to new adjustments of time use; now that I am conscious of the fact I have been counting down the days even though I got the vaccine.

 

I sure enjoy the comforting feeling I have knowing I am going to be immune to Covid-19.

 

I hope all of you are well.

[Deleted54170User]

I had some pressing senses today.

 

I heard the rain drops start falling this evening. Just an hour or two before dusk. The noise sounded like an occasional tapping outside the opened window. The screen window let in fresh air while it was sunny and warm. The little taps started right after I posted to The Last Poster Wins. Happy droplets of rainfall. They made the vultures fly away that had moved to a roof on the house across the way. They were all facing my way when I looked out and saw those pitiful images of scavenger birds.

 

Several times; while I managed my morning and afternoon routine I felt that sense. I got the sense in the afternoon mostly. I sensed there were vultures sitting on a tree watching and waiting. They will be waiting for a lot longer time now, because I got the Covid-19 Vaccination thirty days ago, and I feel good.

[Deleted54170User]

Inspiration is a state of mind. Motivation is a feeling that someone gives me cause to do what seems like divination. Friending people gave me hope that we might be and make a world we would all agree was fine, good for us!

 

I friended many of you.

 

I think about all of you. As though we are actively making up a better world we all could agree we would like it to be for us to live.